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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> ODAT 11/8
Post Info TOPIC: ODAT 11/8
Freetime


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ODAT 11/8
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Today's page in One Day At A Time In Al-Anon distinguishes between self-love and love of self.  In the author's terms, self-love means a big ego and lack of empathy, while love of self reflects the Biblical phrase "Love thy neighbor as thyself."  Only when we value ourselves can we truly love others.

Reminder:  "Self-love often wears a mask of false humility behind which we exaggerate our own importance, and justify the wrongs we do to others. True humility comes from love of self, which is the realization of ourselves as we really are."
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In working the steps, an amazing thing happened for me, which was a greater appreciation for myself.  Although I dreaded Step Four, I was surprised that it had me first look at my assets.  Only by placing my assets first could I have the strength to look at my defects and not feel humiliated.

I also remember thinking about that Biblical phrase and suddenly realizing -- WOW!!  It says love thy neighbor AS thyself -- not more than thyself!!  I had been lacking in self-respect, and it was enlightening to see that I could bring my self-esteem up a few notches while not de-valuing other people. I just have to keep things in balance.

Today, I will demonstrate my love-of-self by staying home from one of my regular F2F meetings so I can take care of a health issue.   I will miss the people in the group -- I am really fond of them -- but when I return,  I will be more in balance.



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PosiesandPuppies


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Thank you Freetime for this great reminder!

Hope all goes well with the health.

TGIF MIP! LOL!

out!

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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend

"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness."  Mary Oliver

 

 
Lyne


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Thanks FT for your service. We discussed this reading in my F2F meeting this week. What I realized is that I needed to treat myself the way I treat others. I had been neglecting to give myself the respect and compassion I gave to others which came naturally. I think doing the steps with my sponsor, and doing the daily homework of listing an asset each day, taught me that along with my character defects I had assets! It was a true revelation. And since I have resigned from the doormat club, it becomes easier and easier to treat myself as I treat my neighbor, Lyne

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Lyne
DavidG


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 aww  Thanks Freetime, and y'all.... I tell this story, often enough. But I had not realised the the basic notion originated from ODAT.

       Years ago I hear a member say: "it's a selfish programme." And I thought to myself- No, it's not! I said to myself,

       there and then that I wanted not to be self centred, but centred on self. Which is the same thing the reading is saying.

       As I moved more and more into the present moment-one day at a time I got more and more in touch with this happy place. aww ...



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Iamhere


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Thank you Freetime for your service and the daily. I sure hope your health issue goes away soon - sending healing thoughts and prayers!

Thanks to all for your shares and ESH. I discovered in recovery that I treated others way, way better than I treated myself. Others suggested I really, really needed to rethink that. It took time or me to discover that putting me first and practicing self-care really help to restore self-esteem. I try really, really hard to practice all that I've learned in recovery to love myself, be of service to self and others and unconditional accept me and others as imperfect humans, doing the best we can with what we have.

Happy Friday all - may your weekend be awesome....(((Hugs)))


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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging.  Pause before assuming.  Pause before accusing.  Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret.  ~~~~  Lori Deschene

 

 
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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> ODAT 11/8