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Post Info TOPIC: Learning to live, one day at a time...


~*Service Worker*~

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Learning to live, one day at a time...


 

smile ...hi y'all... ...one time I owned 100 sheep, and 600 fruit trees. I hated having the farm- there were family issues involved- but these no longer weigh me down. I got some gates and wire and stuff- and set out to build up a hobby farm. This was a return to the coast where I had worked on a railway gang in the 1970's.

So now, with the arrival of a lamb this year, have four sheep. They are just living lawnmowers really- but take a certain amount of management. Having a ram I had to have a spare paddock elsewhere- and I got an offer for some grazing. And then I agonised about how to manage two only sheep up there- without any yards. This sort of anxiety used to be the bane of my life. My "home block" once had waist high weeds and grass- and the sheep have dealt with this. It is a win-win because they deposit pellets which enrich the soil.

I nearly bought three gates to make makeshift yards. Then I realised that I already had gates on the property. All I had to do was to put the resident two sheep in a yard- and lift and borrow the gates.

Easy peasy... ...but hey- I grew up in the black and white world of "my way or the highway". Ugh!

Now that my historic trauma is clearing up, my thinking still takes some work- but it is improving.

Waiting a week for a meeting- I used to look forward to this. Squeeze into a room and share if possible.

Being able to share online- is like about 4 meetings a week. It does take time to get to know other group members. With each person the boundaries are different. Even the means of creating the boundaries is always new- and challenging... and exciting sometimes... aww

...but hey!

it is ~one day at a time...~  biggrin ...



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~*Service Worker*~

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Oh cool David==

So how many sheep do you have before you get to need a Border Collie? Saw a video the other day of an aggressive sheep nipping a Border Collie on the nose. That was one aggressive sheep. Probably a ram.

I love reading about the things you've done--seems to exotic to me.

Bless you. Keep healing and please keep telling us about it.

Temple

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It's easy to be graceful until someone steals your cornbread.  --Gray Charles

 



~*Service Worker*~

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 Oh Temple!

                    I would have given my eye teeth for a border collie. Our dad and neighbour were hopeless farmers really. They both had a rag-tag mob of sheep. We had to round them up from time to time. They were hard to yard- and would take off for the hills time and time again. Long story short- we used to have to wear them out chasing them- to get them into the pen.

So, over time I actually became the border collie- but I did not nip... biggrin ...



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Hi DavidG, 

Wow, what a lovely share, it is always a pleasure to read  them, so Honest, and Positive. Puts a smile on face, to try to capture you Being Farmer David, chasing the sheep around, was their many swearing words, or not? I just bet you loved them.smile

Look forward to the next ones.

Love WendyP.



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~*Service Worker*~

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  smile Wendy- I am not a one to swear much- like every second word. Every once in a while though I would let out a ripper!

      When our kids came along I decided to adopt a word- to take the place of that ripper, and I chose RATS!

      Worked a charm when i needed to work off a bit of steam! biggrin ...



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Each Alanon member is my teacher.                                                                                                                  

Bo


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Living life one day at a time...one minute at a time when needed...is very "unnatural" at its core.

Almost everything we do in life, in the course of our everyday living...is about next, later, ahead, future, and so on.

Living life one day at a time...is about...being present.

Keep your head where your feet are.

__________________

Bo

Keep coming back...

God, grant me the serenity...to accept the PEOPLE I cannot change...the courage to change the ONE I can...and the wisdom to know it's ME...

 



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 2940
Date:

 

smile ...hi y'all... ...one time I owned 100 sheep, and 600 fruit trees. I hated leaving the farm- there were family issues involved- but these no longer weigh me down. I got some gates and wire and stuff- and set out to build up a hobby farm. This was a return to the coast where I had worked on a railway gang in the 1970's.

So now, with the arrival of a lamb this year, have four sheep. They are just living lawnmowers really- but take a certain amount of management. Having a ram I had to have a spare paddock elsewhere- and I got an offer for some grazing. And then I agonised about how to manage two only sheep up there- without any yards. This sort of anxiety used to be the bane of my life. My "home block" once had waist high weeds and grass- and the sheep have dealt with this. It is a win-win because they deposit pellets which enrich the soil.

I nearly bought three gates to make makeshift yards. Then I realised that I already had gates on the property. All I had to do was to put the resident two sheep in a yard- and lift and borrow the gates.

Easy peasy... ...but hey- I grew up in the black and white world of "my way or the highway". Ugh!

Now that my historic trauma is clearing up, my thinking still takes some work- but it is improving.

Waiting a week for a meeting- I used to look forward to this. Squeeze into a room and share if possible.

Being able to share online- is like about 4 meetings a week. It does take time to get to know other group members. With each person the boundaries are different. Even the means of creating the boundaries is always new- and challenging... and exciting sometimes... aww

...but hey!

it is ~one day at a time...~  biggrin ...



__________________

Each Alanon member is my teacher.                                                                                                                  



~*Service Worker*~

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  aww Thanks Bo...

                            ...just stopping by, for a chat, takes time away from worry and anxiety. I do it sometimes in queues, or on public transport. This works well for someone with a foreign accent- because people will rise to the occasion, if they think there is a visitor around. aww 

But, for us, I think it is a treasure...: smile 



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Each Alanon member is my teacher.                                                                                                                  



~*Service Worker*~

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David - I'm late to your share as I was being a road warrior with a gal pal, and am working to catch up around here! I love that you're doing some yard-mowing farming! My son who has a small house with a family of 4 in the middle of the city acquired a Great Pyrenees puppy about 8 months ago....he is a beautiful dog and is growing BIG! Last I saw him, a few weeks ago, he's taller than I and able to reach well above the table!

I'm a huge animal person and respect all. There's a certain level of peace and awe in observing, loving and living with animals. I truly believe my dog reminds me how to do this One Day at a Time gig....she doesn't hold onto anything from the day before, is joyful and positive no matter what the day brings and just lives moment to moment.

I too think MIP is a treasure and so missed it while I was roadtripping! There was a certain level of comfort though in knowing it would still be here when I returned. (((Hugs)))

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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging.  Pause before assuming.  Pause before accusing.  Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret.  ~~~~  Lori Deschene

 

 



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Hi, David, you talk of your meetings, wow, I envy all of the people that have meetings to go to, talking one on one, face to face. I use to love my meetings and all that I had and did within Alanon. Today, I class myself as a Lone Member, these are my meetings, my life line. All of you will never know how much you help me, keep my head above water, and to stay centered in my life, and I love all of you for being here.

You talk of you accent, I think I remember that you come from New Zealand. I went over there in 1990 on a Tour for Rugby League and Union Tests. Staying mostly in Wellington, for the Games, and some time in Auckland. Went by myself, what an adventure. Loved every minute of it. I fell in love with Your Country, it is just so beautiful. Regarding your Accent, well the People in charge of the Tour took all of us to the Races, me not knowing anything about Horses, racing, too mean to Gamble. Decided to go up to the TAB and put a bet on, said to the lady behind the counter, that I wanted to put a bet on and didn't have a clue of how to do it. I only had opened my mouth, and she said to me" oh, you would have to be an a Australian"? I replied," How could you tell".

Being by myself, with my Health, I don't get out much, but when I do, I do like you speak to everyone, or most people. I am a people person. I follow the sports a lot, and follow the New Zealand Rugby League team,, the Warrior, not the All Blacks. I am not a fan of them.

I can picture you with your sheep. When we were Transferred out West Queensland, nearly in the desert , was so Hot one night, had all of the windows open, and can remember be woken up with this noise. About 3am. Went out in the lounge room to see what it was. To see my 2 Daughters, aged 5&6 standing in the door way, with about 3,000 sheep all around our house.Being animal lover, always wanted to have a pet Lamb, that soon changed, as our neighbours next door got one, and it never shut up. But I loved the little Black ones.

Always lovely to read your sharings,

Love WendyP.

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~*Service Worker*~

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   IAm... I followed your journey with interest- and looked forward to your return here. As a kid I was one of those people who loved having pen-pals- and I am always keen to hear about life in other lands! And I am still keen. smile ...

Wendy... -our AB's had a big come-down at the World Cup... a lot of re-thinking to do. The netball is great with strong but friendly rivalry. Th beanie of Oz, is having three codes- League, Rugby union and Aussie rules- so your allegiance is split three ways.

I thought our lambing season was over, having lost one lamb in a bad storm. However this poor wee thing turned out to be a twin! And ewe two became a mum this week! A far cry from the big sheep sheep runs in Oz and NZ...

We grew up around a race course. and the sound of an auctioneer, or a compere for a horse race, still sounds like music to my ears. Part of our heritage... smile ...



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Hi David, oh I think I have found someone who I can talk to about sport.Alot of me look at me, and use to try to put me down because I spoke a lot about Sports, tried to make out I didn't know what I was talking about.  I use to think to myself, Really. I do hope your poor little Darling Lamb is doing okay. I always said that I wouldn't make a good Farm wife, as in Winter, Summer, I would have all the Animals inside. I am a big sook. I care too much.

That day of the Ruby World Cup Semi finals, I watched it, was I so glad to see the Poms beat the All Blacks, took them down a peg or too. They really didn't like losing.  On the final game,  Poms versus South Africa, I really thought that the Poms would beat South Africa, what a game. South Africa wouldn't let the Poms into the game at all. I was so disappointed at the end of the game, to watch when the Poms were handed their medals, some wouldn't take them at all, others who had them around their necks took them off when they got down off stage. They copped a lot of flack with the media of it. Very Poor losers. Also, that day, me being me, I watched 3 games of Rugby League, before I finished with the World Rugby Final.

It was an a lot of teams from around, Tonga, Fiji, New Zealand, English and Australia. Wow, the best for me was to see,  Kiwis get up against the Poms, and Tonga beat Australia. For that I get into an awful lot of trouble, as I don't go for any Australian Team at all. Been called lots of names, doesn't worry me, though. The Australians are just far to smart for their own good. Win at any costs. All of the other Teams play for pride, they don't, think that they deserve to win. The only Australian team I use to go for, were the Wallabies, but they are Dead Heads, they have been going backwards for years.

You talk about Pen Pals, well, I use to belong to a Group that was World Wide, and I had many Pen Pals. Then, because I was a Lone Member, I was in the Lone Members Letter Box, that was unreal, so wonderful. I will have a story to tell you later, of something that was so unexpected and to a lot of people, unbelievable that happened to me through that Lone Members Letter Box. I don't wonder at how God works in strange ways, after that happened.  that will be my next Chapter for you and others.

Take Care,and will talk again soon.

WendyP.



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~*Service Worker*~

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  smile Wendy... one of my old worries- is about getting "zapped" for saying the wrong thing- even in Alanon. In my family hone i could get zapped daily, and sometimes hourly for doing and saying the wrong thing. I am hoping- that some kind person will say something quietly and gently, on this group- if I appear top be out of line! biggrin...

I live in the mountainous high country of NZ... a bit too countrified, at times... and will chat with the fence post if there is no-one around. And sometimes, I think city slickers will think I am being too forward- just spontaneously chatting to someone. But this is my culture... cry ...

...here, in the groups there is no demarkation between sharing time, greeting time, and good ol' coffee time. In Rapid City, SD I went to Alanon which had a strong Lakota flavour... where after the meeting we would go over the road to the caf. and chill-out... and that is what I came up with the idea of coffee time.

There is one member here I have had coffee time with- in real time! I don't thing I get any special favours for this- I hope not! But we always have had a trusting caring bond- since this coffee time happened after a meeting we attended together!

But hey- time to chill-out... move slowly from friendliness to friendship... and chit-chat... and chill out.

I was hopeless at sports, as a kid- and the really only sport I participated in was a pony club. But I do watch sports- as you do, where national honour is at stake. Oh yes... and even though we live on either side of the moat- it is obviously not a sensitive or contentious issue between us!

Just to have a yard and a chat. 

Being an omega male, really I tried to have a crack at Oz through the Banjo Paterson Bush Ballad Tournament... at a rural town in NSW. But, sadly my stage presence was so poor [far too shy!] I did not get anywhere. But- as we Anzacs say- we are willing to have a crack at anything! Do, or die. Win, or lose.

The penpal angle, or e-pal is a good thing, I would say. None of us need go out of the room to chat, and to catch-up.

I have really good friends here. Many, in fact. I have a special friend here I got to know- right from the get-go. And over time I found that she was a good friend to many! Someone who had the happy knack of making one feel like a genuine adult. To model true maturity, in other words. aww ...

A glance up to the top here confirms that I started this thread. So I am not encroaching on anyone's else's time. Sadly we have been seeing the smoke from bush-fires over here- when we have an easterly. Hope you, and your family, are not anywhere near those fires!

I am reaching the end of my steps- and working on ways of looking at Tradition 4... I am counting on "keeping it simple". To work through a simple, humble conversation... where anyone reading has room to move- and to join in- seems to be a good start- and why not?

Cheers... I like your talk...

DavidG.



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smile Hi David,  thankfully, I read your last Sharing, and saw that you live in New Zealand. I just thought that  you were living in America. I am learning about this Programme. There were only 2 Places in the World that I ever wanted to see, New Zealand, and Ireland. I got to New Zealand, can't get to Ireland, but through DVD's  I bring Ireland to me. Being Summer over here, I am into Cricket, all the Tournaments of Golf will be soon on TV.  I saw with interest that the New Zealand team will be here with Pakistan. I will be going for both of them, not Australia. I have always  liked New Zealand team, as they have always been treated as if they are a second rate team, and especially what Greg Chappell did to them all those years ago, I can still remember it. I also watched them in the World cup, I wanted so much for them to win, but they played great. They have proven themselves to the world, not to take them lightly.  I don't know if you follow Cricket, but what two of the Australians did in South Africa, David Warner, and another  very young cricketer Bancroft,  Warner got him to rub Sand Paper over the ball,  to try to win.I was just so disgusted by all of it. Warner didn't have the gutz to do it himself, they have all just returned to the game.  I think that they should have been banned for life.

At the moment here, we are  in dire straights,with Dust, Heat, and many, many Bush Fires. So many homes, have been destroyed, roads cut. The worst of it all, we are running out of water fast. Where I live,we are allowed 100litres a day, soon it will be down to 81, as our Dam will be out of water completely early next year. Some New Zealand  Fire Fighters have been brought over to help relieve some of ours, and now another State is in Danger, Summer isn't even here yet. I don't watch the TV, as it is so distressing to watch people who have lost everything. My heart goes out to them. I say an awful lot of prayers. I am not in any Danger here, but have Family all over the State,so pray for them, to be safe.

You talk about Alanon, when I was Active in Alanon, I loved it, it saved my life. I had my Alanon Birthday last September,  34years, {I think} It was when my Second Marriage to an  Alcoholic, was breaking down, and my first Grand Son was born. My God looked down and said to me, 'I have had you, You are getting Help', but realistically, He knew that I had a lot of confidence in Him, but not in myself. Sadly, I had to leave the Meetings, a long time ago, as it became too Toxic for me to continue, so I continue to be a Lone Member. I do miss it though, and am very grateful, for the wonderful time, and real Friends that I did have. But it really did hurt me, and has taken me a lot of courage  to reach out again.But , thankfully, I know I need it, and this one is here for me. So can really relate to what you are saying.

Well that's enough of me, hope you have a lovely weekend, what ever you plan to do. Was lovely to chat to you once more.

WendyP.



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~*Service Worker*~

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 Hi Wendy... I got a thrill from seeing your reply! I see you are still online... I was determined not to reply right away, in case Y'all thought I was emotionally needy! biggrin  But i do plan to reply- in a week or so...  ...smile ... I have been in Alanon about the same time as you! Yay! aww ...



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biggrin Oh David, just read your sharing, am still laughing about what you said about being "Needy".  I  would love you anyway, you have a lot of mates, me in particular. There is no shame in being "Needy" if you are. I had a thought in my head, about  talking to you too much, about Sport, and not enough of Alanon. I often say to my friends, please,don't try to get into my head, there isn't any room.

Don't you ever stop being you. You are a fantastic person, and you don't how much you help a lot of people, you have so much to give.

Love WendyP.



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~*Service Worker*~

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   Aw gee, Wendy... i had to bite down hard on my tongue- when I saw your post here this afternoon. After hearing about your support for our cricket team- I could not mention the visit from the 2IC of the royal family being here. Did they stop for fuel in OZ? Did y'all get the royal wave? If you didn't you richly deserve one! biggrin  ...



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Hi David, have the Cricket on  TV, muted, love to listen to Radio, but keep my fingers on the pulse. There is a young Pakistan Bowler, who is only 16 playing in his first Test, so interested to watch him. Of course  Australia don't give them a chance. I did hear that the Royals were in New Zealand, I definitely am not a Royal Fan, I  only love William, Kate, Harry, and Megan,and especially Dianna.  I don't look up  to the others at all.

Hope you have a lovely weekend.

Love Wendy.



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~*Service Worker*~

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Ooh... I still recall the thrill I got- opening our rural letterbox- and seeing a hand-addressed letter!

Yep- maybe Charlie and Camilla are creating a diversion over here- things around the palace aint been too happy this week. But to be fair... and not so cynical- they are making an appearance in our northern/southern city- around the awful massacre that happened last year.

In my formative years I was outwardly anti-establishment and hated the royals. Since the passing of Lady Di "the firm" has made major changes and appears to be much less dysfunctional this time round. Going back 100's and 1000's of years- they are amongst the most talked about people in the world!

Went to a funeral this afternoon- one of those lovely ones- for a 90-year old. He was NZ's greatest ever cowboy poet. A true cowboy who rarely left the small settlement he grew up in. We got the full version of The Man From Snowy River.

Doc Martin is on tonight at 8.30. We get Cath and Keem, Neighbours, and in the day- even- Dame Edna. American shows, British, and Canadian sometimes. We kiwis are spoiled brats!

Must look in on the cricket, now! biggrin ...



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