The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Tomorrow's reading is about Step 8. The reading suggests that reviewing our step inventory (4th Step) can help refresh our memories. We can ask ourselves about situations where our defects were present and consider adding names that we've not previously thought of. We can also look at folks on our list, and ask ourselves if we've behaved in similar ways towards others. Many of us discover previously hidden patterns of destructive behavior through our writing. Often, we've harmed others with the best of intentions - and add them to the list.
Step 8 allows us see the harm done, not to berate self but instead to make changes and amends to feel better about our behavior and our way of relating to others.
The Reminder: An Eighth Step list helps me to let go of guilt and regret I may be carrying from the past. I will approach this Step with love and gentleness because I take it for my own freedom.
The Quote from . . . In All Our Affairs: " . . . Our actions have consequences, and some times other people get hurt. By taking Step Eight, we acknowledge this fact and become willing to make amends."
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Step 8 helps us continue to heal. All that's asked is for us to make a list and become willing. For me, each situation I reviewed and each person I considered definitely showed me a pattern of destructive behavior I had relied upon for a long time. I was now very aware that I had spent lots of time/energy/effort throwing blame/shame towards others when my own actions/reactions/attitudes had a lot of room for improvement.
My first effort at the steps was my best at the time. I've repeated them and amazingly enough, more is revealed. Each time I formally work the steps, I find new areas for me to change and grow, all a certain improvement compared to BR (Before Recovery). I am very comfortable in my skin today and that's not where I wanted to be at all when I began this journey!
Grateful for recovery and grateful for MIP! Make tomorrow a great day all - it's my birthday and I've got a full day of plans! Awesome that I get to do two of my favorite things (golf and softball) with some gatherings in-between....Joy, Joy, Joy!! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Lovely thoughtful share, Iam... it is you birthday here, already, where I live... so have a really happy birthday when you wake up... and enjoy the day, my friend-
Happy Birthday IAH hope the day is enjoyable. Loved your share on today's reading. Step 8 was a little frightening to me in the beginning of this journey, however when my sponsor spoke about the benefits I immediately prayed for "awareness" tob last through my denial and then was given the willingness to make amends. I am ever grateful to this program.
My favorite part of this, is the notion of "Willingness." Sometimes making this list is tough. Depending on who it is that is on the list, it may even be difficult to find the willingness. But when you do... when you do, boy does your body feel light as a feather!
Go forth and spread your Joy MIP family!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
HAPPY BIRTHDAY IAH! And thanks for your service and share. I like the word "freedom" because that is a concept that has become a reality since program. I was in a prison of negative emotions and behaviors prior to alanon. After a year or two I realized I could be free of that ball and chain around my ankle, at least most of the time. So let me throw in a Hallelujah as well!
Another great realization about the program is that it is centered around me getting healthy and growing up. I used to be stuck. Step 8, getting willing to make amends, and then making amends, sets me free. Grateful member, Lyne
Thank you for your service and share Iamhere. I'm grateful for the other shares, as well.
I also find it helpful to show up willing... willing to acknowledge and forgive myself and others as I learn healthier ways to think and respond... all of this as progress, not perfection.
Lovely thoughtful share, Iam... it is you birthday here, already, where I live... so have a really happy birthday when you wake up... and enjoy the day, my friend-
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