The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Todays reading is about the difficulty some of us have had in speaking up directly- about anything and everything! The writer described being too quiet, unable to speak up. That can be true for me as well, but in my case I know that in my family, most of the time things that we wanted to say were covered up with sarcasm. It was rare to hear something expressed directly and without being covered up by sarcasm. I grew up in situations that featured sarcasm as sport-in a big family, whoever got the last jab in won. These days I find myself being more wary of people who use sarcasm in this way, and gravitate toward those who are able to speak their mind freely and clearly.
Learning to speak up and be able to state things without expectation, or fear of how we are affecting how others think of us, has been one of the great freedoms of Al-Anon.
Thank you Mary for the daily wisdom, and for that honest glimpse into your family dynamic!
I happen to love sarcasm. But it can be biting, and hurtful - I don't like that aspect of it! With this program, I have learned to be less sarcastic and more "real."
I used to be a shy soul as a youngster... I "grew out" of that in my college years through all the experiences (Like Debate/Speech class) that I had to participate in...but I would still categorize me as an introvert. I seemed to have devolved into a doormat/martyr in my adult years.
Today, I have learned to say what I mean, mean what I say, and not say it mean. I am evolving... I am a work in progress!
You should be almost done with your year I think, Mary! Hope you have wonderful summer plans!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Thank you Mary for your service and the daily. I too grew up with tons of criticism, sarcasm and the like. It's taken me a ton of practice in recovery to learn how to say what I mean, mean what I say and to not say it mean. I am grateful that I am a work in progress!
Happy Sunday all - make it a great day!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Good topic. At my face to face meeting tonight, we read the daily readings for each of our birthdays. We use three books for reading, the ODAAT, Courage to Change, and Hope For Today. The readers help members with their shares, jogging loose memories and encouraging them to speak up. so I agree with your post is all I wanted to say
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Not all my days are priceless, but none of them are worthless, anymore.