The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I haven't been on here in quite awhile. At least for me. I am actually having a hard time writing this. I am in a recovery place that I have not been to in years. I am recovering from a near breakdown. I was totally worried & almost went to the hospital for my condition but it has been over to weeks since I felt the pressure. I went to see my mom as I have already mentioned. I saw her on her 76th birthday. It was good but the atmosphere made me uncomfortable. I have not been in an assisted living situation except the time that I went to see her before. Anyway, I gave her pink roses, gifts & we played dominoes & another game. My hubby made her a cake. The thing is is that I have been anxious about a lot of things & that was one of the biggest. So, I was under stress for a lot of other things as well. My anxiety got a hold of me & I crashed when I got home that evening. The ride was almost torture. We traveled over 200 miles to see her. Anyhow, as I got home I felt a sense of loss. I didn't want to be the way I was. A lot of people were asking about my mom & in the meantime, I felt like why aren't they asking me. Poor me I guess. I didn't want to be a part of society at all. I am taking great strides now. It takes a lot & I have been here before. I am grateful for the recovery process. No matter how down I feel I can get up. I have this saying I think it goes like this: If you have something bothering you look up! I need that right now. My HP has always been there for me, I just moved. I am so grateful that some of you know that what I am going through. I need similarities not differences.
I will continue to update my story as it comes to me. I am at a public library. It is one of the only ways I can get on here now. I used to have a smart phone that I used & my tablet. I just don't want to get caught up w/ drama. I mean that some of the social media is not necessary now for my recovery.
((Kathleen))) I missed you and can so understand your concerns. Love that you made the effort to visit your mom and brought a tasty home made cake
please keep posting
(((Kathleen))) - I too have missed you and glad to hear that you are past your mom's birthday! I love the idea of looking up when feeling down - keep doing you and keep coming back!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
You sound so positive and I think you have cone a very long way I can see measurable good results from the hard work you have done.
I read something once that said what we call a breakdown is often more of a breaking "up." A reorganization of the psyche, and that actually it can be viewed as a positive. I wonder if it is a form of acceptance, a letting go, a step in the right direction of seeking more help from HP, allowing help from other people as well.
Good for you, in any case.
Temple
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It's easy to be graceful until someone steals your cornbread. --Gray Charles
