The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The reading for Monday, 4/8, discusses the value of examining the past, but not getting stuck there. The author says for those of us who denied, distorted, or lost touch with painful memories, facing the reality of our past can be a crucial part of our recovery. However, fond memories must also be recognized.
We cannot change the reality that we have harmed others, and others have harmed us. But we can only change the present day. The author suggests facing the past and then moving on.
The quote for today : The past is but the beginning of a beginning.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I value the reading for today as I spent years dwelling on my past, and many more years worrying about the future. What a waste of time and energy! Especially if things get rough in the present, I can use my tools and focus on ODAT, Let go and let God, Keep it simple, and a host of other tools and people that enable me to keep the focus on myself and stay on a good path. Lyne
Mahalo Lyne and David. I was born with in the disease and with an indelible memory which serves to keep me very aware of what it was like, what happened and what is happening now. I remember my very first conversation with my HP in the delivery room saying "I don't want to be here". I was adamant and was delivered with forceps. My mother received stitches which she never forgot and which had to do some with her abusive treatment as I was growing up. This and the alcoholic DNA wasn't a very healthy start for me and then just a bit later having the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors rise up within caused me to fight for some kind of clarity I could hold on to. My past from birth is present and active with the exception of a rebirth within the Al-Anon Family Groups. I am still striving to live that rebirth on a daily basis with more acceptable thoughts, feeling, behaviors and intentions. Mahalo for the share. and Mahalo also to you David. (((((hugs)))))
Good Morning Lyne and all who shared their ESH on this important topic I know that prior to program i was stuck in the past emotionally and most days i responded to life in the present moment from my past unpleasant experiences . Looking at the past in an objective manner * as encouraged by the Steps, i learned how to extract the lessons from them let go of my anger and grow. Thank you alanon and thank you lyne for your service
Good morning MIP! Thank you Lyne for the daily and for your service. I love that Al-Anon has given me the tools and blueprint to be set free from the past and to anticipate the future with joy vs. doom. I can relate to dwelling on the past and having fear of the future as I was very rigid in how I perceived the world. I do believe today that the past is just that - the past - can't be changed but can be used to learn. I also know (thank you Al-Anon) that the past does not define the present or the future and when I just show up, do the next right thing and trust God that all is and will always be well in my world!
Make it a lovely day all - I get to golf today and get to have tacos with lovely gal pals! We've got lovely weather, everything is turning green and I am thoroughly excited for spring!!! (((Hugs)))
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I love today's reading!!! Too many times, the past has defined, controlled, dictated, tainted, and so much more of our PRESENT.
Forming a committee to analyze what happened after the Titanic hit the iceberg...is of ZERO BENEFIT. As a matter of fact, it is detrimental.
At the same time...throwing chairs off the deck of the Titanic, as the ship is sinking...is of ZERO BENEFIT. As a matter of fact, it is detrimental.
In my experience, there is a very vague and ambiguous line that is very easy to cross between looking and learning from the past...and having it or allowing it to have too much impact or affect the present and future.
All the best.
__________________
Bo
Keep coming back...
God, grant me the serenity...to accept the PEOPLE I cannot change...the courage to change the ONE I can...and the wisdom to know it's ME...
Thank you Lyne for your service, and to everyone above who have shared on this important topic.
I tended to push past actions "under the rug" to minimize the hurt. That led to the acceptance of many unacceptable things! I also tended to future-trip A LOT! Thanks to Al-Anon and the Steps, I have found out why I future-trip, and the means to stay more focused on the present.
I awoke today tired, but feeling blessed for all I have at this moment. My mother turns 79 today. My brother and I took her out for lunch yesterday, and we had a wonderful time. I am so thankful that she is still with me to support and love me!
Thank you all for being a part of my journey of healing!
-- Edited by PosiesandPuppies on Monday 8th of April 2019 08:50:12 AM
__________________
"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
PnP - Happy Birthday to your momma! That's awesome - glad you all got together and had a lovely time!
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Lyne- our family did not really kick back and talk about stuff- at all. So a whole heap of stuff got locked away, both good and bad.
(((((hugs)))))