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Post Info TOPIC: Some additional tools that help my self-care


~*Service Worker*~

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Some additional tools that help my self-care


Self-care is so often overlooked. I know, for me especially it was overlooked a LOT pre-Al-Anon.

I used to think that just exercise and eating right would take care of all my troubles.

I've since learned I need balance in my self-care if I want to feel balanced in my life.

For me, balance includes physical, spiritual, and emotional/mental health. I need to take care of all three.

 

Al-Anon is great as it helps me tremendously on the spiritual front. And a lot of that spiritual help also ties in with emotional/mental health - changing my perspectives, practicing detachment, loving myself all go hand-in-hand with working a spiritual program which puts God front-and-center.

On the physical front I still take care of myself with proper nutrition, exercise, stretching, massages, doctor's appointments, dental appointments, etc.

The other emotional self-care I do is doing things that bring me joy - spending time with friends, art, playing a game, watching fun movies, etc.


But here are some other things I do on a daily basis to help with that balance:

  1. I keep a daily gratitude list. I fill a page in a notebook every single day with things I am grateful for. If I'm feeling particularly zealous, I'll give myself the challenge to not repeat any gratitudes for a week straight. One time I did an exercise of 30 things I was grateful for, for 30 days, and I didn't repeat anything. That ended up being 900 unique things I could be grateful for in a month.
  2. I keep an on-going "win list". I cannot tell you how important this is to me, especially when I find those days where my head has decided it needs to start beating me up. I go back and read through the growing "win list" and remind myself of all the good I've accomplished and done in my life. This win list consists of anything between "I bought lunch for a homeless person" to "I ran a mile without stopping". Big and small. They all count. So when I start deciding I need to berate myself and tell myself that I don't amount to much or do much good, I go back and read that win list.
  3. I start each day off with prayer and meditation. I say the 3rd step prayer, and then the rest of my prayers are in the form of giving thanks. For instance if a friend is feeling sick, I give thanks to HP for his miraculous healing of my friend. If someone I know is scared, I thank HP for wrapping that person in his comfort and love. After my prayers I settle immediately into meditation. Sometimes my mind just goes for a joyride. Sometimes I spend time thinking about beautiful future possibilities for myself, sometimes I just think about God, sometimes I picture myself surrounded by light.
  4. I have a list of positive affirmations that I've written down that resonate with me (that I feel ARE facts) and I repeat them out loud to myself.
  5. I do physical exercise daily - gentle 20 minutes of yoga in the morning, I take a walk on my lunch break, and when I get home I'll do something more active like aerobics, strength training, dancing, etc.
  6. I read my daily CAL reader.
  7. I talk with my sponsor once a week. I also chat with my sponsee weekly.
  8. I make one to two meetings a week.
  9. I listen to an inspirational audiobook in the car on my drive do and from work.
  10. I make it a point to be continuously learning something. For example I'm trying to learn Spanish as a second language. I study and practice it daily. I'm also learning Salsa dancing - I take a class once a week. But this helps keep me from settling into a rut and suddenly becoming discontent. I think HP wants me to experience a lot out there - not just sit at home and zone out and watch TV every night.
  11. I limit my television. I don't read or watch the news. If I do watch something, it's educational, fun, or inspirational.
  12. I turn off all electronics a couple hours before bed. In that time I wind down, write some more follow-ups gratitudes if more came up during the day, sometimes I'll meditate again. I pull out an entertaining book and read it.

 

All of these things help me so much. Does it mean it shields me from bad days, bad attitudes, and all negativity? Definitely not. But these tools help me get back to a state of feeling serene and even joyful when those negative times arise.

I'm curious what other's self-care routines look like? I know all the above sounds like a LOT, but when you think of it, you have roughly 72 hours of "free" time during your week. How do you spend them? (72 comes from 168 hours a week minus 40/wk if you work full-time and minus another 56 if you're getting your full 8 hours of sleep each night.)

(Came back and edited my math - I previously had people only sleeping five days a week instead of seven -haha!)



-- Edited by Aloha on Friday 5th of April 2019 02:00:45 PM

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~*Service Worker*~

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Great list Aloha I do most of these on a daily y basis as well. They do keep me focus on recovery and growing in faith
Thanks for the reminder



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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


~*Service Worker*~

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 Aroha, Aloha, from Ao-te-aroha... [New Zealand]... smile ...

I will give you one example of my mahi [walk].

Four years ago I had sleep apnea. Not a weight issue for me- it was from years of chronic anxiety.

We get state care here- but it may take years. I got sick of going up and down to the city, so I struck out.

i know that shallow breathing might be a symptom for me...

us kiwis life far away from civilisation- so we have this DIY culture.

I just started purposeful breathing. Within three or four days i started bring up great hinks of gunk.

Just one cough up had grey and brown gunk in it. This happened for 6 or 8 weeks...

then i began to think clearly- and my death wish went away. Guess is- I must have been drowning, in effect.

 

i believe strongly- in clinical medicine. I had a flu jab this week. I believe that the experts have stuff to learn about us! How we come- and how we deal with our issues. I believe that is is a two way street.

It has taken me a while to catch up on stuff- now my thinking is sorted. "Think" is one of our slogans... these days ah kin live it! smile ...

Kia miharo ki a koe... mahalo... biggrin ...



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Each Alanon member is my teacher.                                                                                                                  

El


~*Service Worker*~

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Great list, Aloha!  Thank you for sharing with us.  I know I need to step up my self care when I am getting irritable, resentful, frustrated, anxious.  It might take a few days, but Ill see the red flags and step up my game for ME.  

I make gratitude lists, have a God Box, journal.  I schedule more time away from the house, delve further into my interests, and pray for serenity and a change of my attitude.  Before Alanon I would have just complained, whined and boo-hoo-ed myself.

I will look forward to more responses!

Ellen



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