The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
In today's reading from Courage to Change, the author shares that they used to think that living was surviving from crisis to crisis. Thanks to AlAnon's 12 traditions, the author has learned how a healthy family functions. The traditions have made it possible for the author to be a part of a group that encourages their growth, helped the author learn to detach, to respect the privacy of others, and to feel some release from the need to dominate and control. The author has developed a sense of their own value, as well as their own limitations, which helps them to know what they can change, and what they must accept.
Today's Reminder: Because the traditions are based on spiritual principles, they often apply to personal matters as well as group concerns. When I get tangled up in problems with other people, the traditions can offer guidance and perspective.
Today's Quote: "The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions embody principles that lead to recovery and personal growth, helping each of us to discover and become the person we want to be."
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I can certainly understand the view of life as surviving from crisis to crisis. Since my wife's addiction issues are co-occurring, that is still how life is sometimes. But thanks to the program, I see the difference between my life and her life, and I recognize the difference between my crisis and her crisis. (At least most of the time.) I see as well that I get to chose whether I dive into a crisis, or stay on the sidelines, and this is how I've found some serenity. In my face-to-face group we are half way through our discussion of the traditions, and I find these discussions help me to understand the program better, and apply the traditions to my life more directly.
I hope you make today a great day!
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Skorpi
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu
Good morning MIP - thank you Skorpi for your service and the daily! Happy Hump Day too to one and all.
I also can relate to existing vs. living and jumping from one crisis to another. So much so, that when I began practicing suggested tools in recovery, it felt uncomfortable to be still, and detach/stay on my side of the street. I am very grateful that those who came before me had the wisdom to design this program, including the traditions/steps/tools/etc. It really can be a blueprint for living a much better life than I had adopted before!
Today, I do see me an an individual with choices on how I use my resources. I avoid drama and chaos as much as possible - in my home, life, friends circle, etc. I keep things as simple as possible, and find myself asking God often to direct my actions towards the next right thing. When I pause long enough to pray, more often than not, what's happening around me is really not my business!
What the program, and especially the traditions have also revealed to me is that even the dysfunction within my family does not preclude me or excuse me from loving and accepting others unconditionally. Even if/when their words and actions vastly vary from my own, I can choose to just be happy instead of trying to be right (imposing my ego and will).
Make it a great day MIP family - some chores this morning, and more golf this afternoon! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thank you Scorpi for your service and above shares. I sure didnt have a healthy FOO and was given no tools for life. With program under my belt though I can practice ODAT, step 1 as my spouse is a dry drunk, and lately I am trying to keep appropriate expectations in tune with reality, not want I wish they would be. Ive come to enjoy peace and try not to join a crisis. Thanks for this very good topic, Lyne
Good Morning Skorpi Thank you for posting this reminder regarding the spiritual principles embodied in the Steps and Traditions i HAVE embraced these Spiritual guidelines as my guideposts so as to have a successful positive life and am so grateful to alanon Thanks for your service.
Thank you Skorpi for your service, and I appreciate your share, Iamhere!
I especially like the Principles before Personalities... especially when it comes to my F2F groups. Raising my son, I was so involved with many different group entities. There were many times, this principle could've been employed! LOL!!
I am glad I can utilize today.
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
I used to frequently think, well, here we go again....if its not one thing , its another! Funny how I dont feel that way as much as I used to and I think its because I dont allow myself to get caught up in everyones drama anymore. A daughter, my friends, various family members who are mad at each other.... I have gotten good at stepping back, turning away or leaving them to their own misery. I have enough work on dealing with my own thoughts and recovery!
Great message and posts. Had a wonderful day visiting 2 of my grandchildren who are about 1 hour away. Beautiful day for a drive and quality time spent with my sweethearts!