The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The C2C reading for today 3-19 speaks about the basic fact that alcoholism is e disease and a compulsions. The drinker and those interacting with himI have each been affected by the same disease "alcoholism" We believe we know how everyone should behave and try to force our way
The reading points out that the more we try to force change, the more frustrated we can become. . It is obvious we can control no life but my own. Focus on myself , my thoughts, actions and not try to "make another do as I want is a great goal
We have choices how we can respond to each situation we cannot go down the road of self-pity and anger and resentment as these negative tools only hurt us-- instead we can choose to use our alanon tools and pray for guidance.
the quote is: from Ben Franklin :" Clean your finger before you point it at my spots"
It has been my experience that my compulsion to "fix" my broken people has only led me to feelings of despair... sometimes I even felt like I was crazy! Yes, there was lying and gas-lighting by my SO that contributed, but after I began to examine myself, it was my compulsions that ALSO contributed to my crazy life!
I am thankful today that I have a better way.
Peace!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Thanks Betty for your service. I spent more years than I care to remember trying to force solutions on my A. Not one bit of good came out of it, and in fact, I became very sick myself. It is through alanon that many parts of my life have changed for the better. Lyne
Thank you for todays reading and your service, Betty. Knowing how everyone should behave could have been my bumper sticker. It is a relief to not judge everyone and every situation anymore. When I find myself going into autopilot with old thoughts, I ask HP to change my attitude and feelings of superiority.
I love the quote, Clean your finger before you point it at my spots. Perfect!
Thank you Betty for the daily and your service! Thank you all for your shares and ESH, and I too can relate...I too felt and thought that I had all the answers for everyone, and we would be in harmony ... IF ONLY!!! Today, I laugh @ how insane I was to try and fix or control other people, places and things as it was such a waste of my time, energy, etc.
I go out of my way today to avoid controlling people. I just have no desire to deal with them and certainly refuse to JADE with them. My heart is at peace to just smile and walk away! I am free to be me, and I have recovery to thank for that. I can recall the feeling of freedom I got when others suggested I was not responsible for the actions, consequences, etc. of those I love with this disease. It concerned me as I had been enabling, controlling, fixing, etc. for so, so long but there was also a feeling of freedom that I could be a stand-alone imperfect person in the middle of a family riddled by multiple generations of alcoholism, addictions, denial, etc. I am grateful to be me, just for today!
(((Hugs))) all - thanks for being a part of my recovery family...
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
(((((((((((((Betty))))))))))))) thanks for your awesome service....I so appreciate your presence here
Clean your finger before you point it at my spots"
Ohhh I was big time guilty of pointing the finger till I really got deep into steps 4,5, 6,7,8,9......big time judger I was...yea, like I had no "issues" myself...LOL
Now , if a person is just not a match for me, I just leave them alone to walk their separate path from mine and leave the judgements to HP....I got my own "spots" to clean...Program has softened my hardness (another survival trait to protect me) about life...so many things....
