The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Todays reading is a focus on the slogan live and let live. The writer describes having some difficulty with this slogan until hearing a speaker at a meeting compare the concept to tending an acre of land. While it is important to tend the land it is equally important not to go beyond the boundary when maintaining the land. The thought for the day goes on to include the idea that we serve our recovery best when keeping the focus on ourselves, not trying to tend someone elses space.
Two thoughts occurred to me as I was reading this today. One was about how often I see the (NH)license plates that feature the words live free or die. This phrase and our slogan live and let live remind me of one another. I used to feel panicked about the situations, actions, words, etc of other people... especially my A. Over time and in recovery Im learning how freeing it is to mind my own business, instead of keeping track of someone elses! Live and let live is about living free for me and about staying out of the way of others as well. The other thought was how often, in the course of a school day, as a music teacher seeing about 400 students twice a week, I am giving reminders about who the students need to be concerned with (if you are about to start a sentence with someone elses name, and you are not givng a compliment, put your hand down; point to the person you are in charge of; do a quick check- are you on track with what you should be doing right now?. Many times I say these phrases to my 5-10 year olds and think, hmm thats decent advice. I should take it for myself!
Today I will do my best to keep the focus on me and I will Live and Let Live- for me thats what living free is all about:)
Good Morning Mary Live and let live is indeed a powerful principlee of this program. I did experience difficulty embracing this idea when i first entered program until i managed to fully embrace the First Step. At that time the practice of focusing on myself was also important so together I worked these tools.
Great reminder. Thanks for your continued service
Yanksfan, thank you for these great reminders. I agree that slogans such as Live and Let Live have given me freedom from the imprisonment of my own thoughts. Thank you for sharing the reminders you give to your students -- definitely good lessons for life.
Thank you Mary for the daily and your service. Thanks to all above me for your shares and ESH. For me, Live and Let Live is no longer foreign! With working the program, and living one day at a time, I am much better at applying this and many other slogans/concepts.
I love how God/recovery works in my life. There has been many things pulling my attention recently from sick parents, brother, friends, cousins, self and other 'life' things....both yesterday's meeting and today's meeting filled me up exactly as was needed for my state of being. Our meeting yesterday was so moving that 4 grown men and 2 grown women were in tears. I felt so less alone as others have real life pain/issues also and we discussed how recovery helps us move from the pain/worry/fret to serenity.
Today's meeting was all about gratitude for life as it is in the moment. Gratitude for feelings, events, grace, etc. - all given to us as promised when we work recovery to the best of our ability. We discussed even being grateful for the though times as it gives us the motivation to change/learn/grow. Live and let live came up both days, multiple times as it's such as easy tool to consider no matter if our discomfort/discontent is related to a person, place, thing...
Happy, happy Sunday all - make it a great day! The sun is finally shining here and it's a bit warmer!! Almost spring....grateful!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thank you Mary, for your service. I loved hearing how you apply your teaching tools at your job, and then realize it would be good for you too!! LOL!
Live and Let Live was difficult to embrace emotionally at first. Yes, I knew the concept, and believed the concept, but accepting it emotionally... that was a different matter. Through working the Steps, and truly understanding that the ONLY person I am in charge of at this moment is myself, I began to really understand this slogan - I Live, and I will accept how you Live as well. BUT, our program teaches me that I don't have to accept the way the other person is living if it is detrimental to my health, mental stability, or marital believes/ideals. Short version: I do not have to accept the unacceptable.
On a lighter note, I am really getting a kick out of a recent commercial. It shows a guy getting a tattoo. The exchange between them is basically how he's just an "OK" tattoo artist, and would you accept "Just OK" for something permanent on your body? At one point the client asks a question, and the artists says, "Whoa, stay in your lane bro." Just they way he says it, I crack up every time! LOL! I find it so hilarious, that I catch myself saying it in my head (in that voice) when I am tempted to over-step by bounds with another!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
the "acre" teaching was about boundaries, as we know them now... good thoughts...
Just before sharing here I wrote to my sister and two remaining brothers... our youngest brother passed on Tx USA late last year. His estate is being tidied up- and I am contemplating dealing with his ashes on the anniversary.
The family have been hurtful. When our step-father passed 4 or 5 months ago they got up and spoke as a family but specifically excluded me. Nothing now can give me back that time and space...
...dealing with mum and dad's ashes they did not participate. With mum a brother might as well have chucked them out the car window- for all I know.
It is hurtful and sometimes they are deliberately hurtful. And sometimes it is just the disease speaking over- and over...
...but I make my own space and path around that... more and more so...
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