The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's reading compares working recovery in Al-Anon to flying down a hill on a bicycle - a feeling of being tremendously alive in perfect balance. One of many tools that helps us get and stay 'there' is Live and let live.
The writer suggests working to embrace whatever life brings with all the joys and sorrows as 'it' always has something to offer. In a recent meeting, another member asked, "What would happen if I started thanking God when problems occurred?" The writer decided that was a good idea, and began - through clenched teeth! Over time, the teeth unlocked, and the writer was able to replace self-pity with gratitude.
We we live our own lives to the utmost, it's easier to allow others to live and let live. Aliveness is ours to have and hold, and we can always pray for the same blessings for others.
Today's reminder -- I want the very best for those I love. I am growing to appreciate the joy of fully participating in life. And I choose to allow others to enjoy this sometimes difficult but rewarding blessing of learning from all experiences. Today I will "Live and Let Live."
Quote for today -- "It is good to have an end to journey towards; but it is the journey that matters in the end." from Ursala LeGuin
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I recall many years ago when my sponsor suggested Thanking God for the pain and lesson. I too had clenched teeth and felt ridiculous! Mainly because my own ego had battled all people, places and things for so, so long, it just felt foolish to lean towards a HP let alone thank him/her for the pain....yet, as often happens in recovery, it did help me to get out of myself, stop blaming/shaming and replace self-pity with gratitude.
I also recall before recovery that I was so focused on the 'end-game' that I never paused long enough to consider today's gifts/joy. I lived with a constant false conceptual thinking process of IF this..........................then or When .....................then. It was non-stop and perpetual. I was raised to work hard and you will be rewarded. Fun or present joy was never a part of any equation for 'success'.
Which, when I arrived at recovery, set aside my ego and got to work, I realized how faulty my thinking was around many concepts. Today, I look at success way different than before. It's not about titles, salary, degrees, income, etc. - it's about the service I am able to give and the legacy I leave behind. So, so grateful to be able to Live and Let Live, even if only for today or one day at a time!
Happy Thursday all - make it a great day!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Good Morning IAH Love the quote, that suggests that it is the" journey "that counts in the end. With alanon tools my journey is now one of courage, wisdom and love Before alanon my journey was filled wtht anger, resentmnet and fear.
I am so very grateful for the tools of this progam as I now accept the guidance of a Higher Power,live one day at a time,iwith detachmnet, compassion and love.
Thanks for your service and have a great day
I am working to embrace whatever life brings with all the joys and sorrows - currently "embracing" a broken stove and the inability to currently afford to replace it. So yeah.
I am a work in progress.
-- Edited by PosiesandPuppies on Thursday 13th of December 2018 12:17:25 PM
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Thanks IAH for your service. It took me awhile to understand "Live and let live" because after all, I did know better what my family should be doing. Yet that "knowing" only brought me pain and misery. With alanon's teaching of learning to focus on myself, Live and let live, and Let go and let God, have allowed me to be a more content person much of the time. In honesty, there are times I backslide and I have unrealistic expectations, which make me miserable again. Thankfully I spend less time in misery and more time feeling better thanks to alanon, Lyne
Hey Posies , I hear you mate. Yesterday I got attacked with another Visit from some termites. It wasnt even a year ago, that I had my guy come out and spray them and we thought we would be done. A new colony showed up near the general area where the first one was, so I had to call him and get him out here to spray these
I did feel the feelings of why me? But this time around I just figured OK this is what it is Ive got to get it taken care of, so when he came out he was only going to charge me $50 because he knows I am living hand to mouth. I gave him $75 which wiped out the checking account until I go to work on Wednesday. I was not going to lose my dignity over money. If I go under, if I cant take care of myself anymore because of life blessing me with this one thing after another setbacks , I am just not going to let money or lack there of rule my life. When I wrote the check he said oh no I cant take that much from you and I told him that I knew how much the pesticide alone costs and I told him I am not going to feel good about myself if I let him walk out of the house taking only $50. There is a thing called doing what is right and making good karma, and I am not gonna let Lack cause me to do Something that just is not right or fair.
I felt good about myself, doing that. I cant be grateful for all the unwanted expenses that have hit me of late, the newest of which is $150 increase in my home insurance, but Im not gonna do anything that is wrong or unfair because of financial fear. At least I can keep my dignity and my sense of doing what is right
Sorry to hear about the termites, Rose! But, the bugs are just doing what they do, ya know? Somehow, it is so much easier for me to embrace this fact in the animal kingdom rather the human one! LOL!
Sadly, I have lost all dignity regarding money with this starting over in life. I've had to rely on parents, friends, the goodness of strangers at times. I think that man was wonderful to give you a price break! You really don't see that much anymore in my neck of the woods. Even though giving him a little more stressed your account, I believe you CHOSE to give him more b/c you felt you could handle it, despite it "wiping out the checking account." It made you feel good, dignified.
I am looking at this time like I am a wall... I am building my foundation, one block at a time. At first, help is needed, but eventually there are enough blocks at the base that I can begin to build on my own. It is slow going, but eventually, it will be strong, like a castle's fortress... able to withstand hundreds of years, and keep me uplifted!
I hope that your work on Wednesday boosts your account to where you feel more secure.
Thanks for sharing!
Peace
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Hey PnP. I loved your analogy about your house foundation. It is kind of what I am doing regarding an issue that I have struggled with all my life and that his fear of that really isnt necessary to feel that much fear and also the self sabotager. I am trying to rebuild my life in the emotional sense in that I can be safe with me. As a child I was in danger from day one of my breath. And that insecure and not feeling safe feeling has stayed with me all of my life. I am unable to trust, the slogan let it begin with me comes to mind here. If I can learn to trust me, really, maybe I can trust in the universe and safe others.
Youre going to be OK. Youve got heart and youve got guts. My bet is on you making it and making it good
"Youre going to be OK. Youve got heart and youve got guts. My bet is on you making it and making it good "
Thanks, Rose! From your lips to my HP's ears! LOL!
I admire you so much, as I have read some psychology cases about fear from childhood. As you said, that unsafe feeling never really leaves you... you have to work at keeping the fear at bay each and every day. Diligence is the word that comes to mind. The effects of your childhood life are so insidious to your adult life.
I really love reading your posts and how you are working at rebuilding your life! I see you as strong, capable... open to embrace a new way of thinking and being... for yourself.
Thank you for being a part of my journey!
Peace & Love
__________________
"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
awwww (((((((((((((((((((((PosiesandPuppies)))))))))))))))))) YOU are a 100% - 24 carat SWEETHEART.....I love reading you as well....and thank YOU for being a part of my journey...........LovenHugs
