The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
A journey begins- with the first step... ...may seem like a cliche... but it is true for me.
First meeting- this member stabs the air with her finger... when you are point the finger- there are three pointing right back at you... ...
also from the same person- she had a battered ODAT in her possession- the spine was falling off the the pages falling out. I thought- that is someone working the programme!
And thirdly- at that same meeting was talk about emotions. This word left an indelible impression- it still does... ...
Hi David you hve a great memory I was probably in too much distress to remember anything about my first meeting--- except that when I left I felt better.
Emotions are tricky and often difficult to handle. i am sure you have many after your loss .
I recall my first meeting - I was not open, I did not want to be there, and as such - ignored the kindness, messages, etc. I returned to try and control, change, cure the chaos in my life for a bit before I got the gift of great desperation and returned to a different group.
I have no doubt the first group was kind, gentle, loving and welcoming....I just didn't 'see' it that way with my own ego/self-serving attitude of the time. I am grateful for a patient, gentle sponsor who gently nudged me to go again, and possibly try a different meeting!
I so agree that emotions are tricky and at times, for me, hard to identify. My go to is 'self-righteous anger' - the only emotion I knew before recovery. Today, when I feel the rise in my body, I do all that I can to pause and consider what am I really feeling. More often than not, it's disappointment, sadness, regret, etc. and not anger at all.
Take good care of you - grieve as you need to and know you are not alone!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
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