The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The author of today's reading in Courage to Change writes that their journey towards finding a Higher Power was gradual. There was no flash of light, just a gradual clearing of the fog. First they just brought their body to Al-Anon, then eventually came to believe they were not alone in the universe, that there was some force that provided the means to make life more joyous, if we only ask for help and keep an open mind.
Today's reminder: The arrival of faith in my life has been a gradual process. This process continues and grows stronger each day I keep myself open to it. Perhaps acknowledging this process will help me when I am impatient with the twists and turns of life.
Quote from Oliver Wendell Holmes: "I find the great thing in this world is not so much where we stand as in what direction we are moving."
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For me, coming to believe that there was a power greater than me that could restore me to sanity -- was also a gradual process. It was built little by little, as proof came along one small experience at a time.
My long-time friend who shared with me how she forgave the alcoholics in her life because they had a disease, not a moral failing -- I never expected to hear that, and had no idea that fact existed and affected people I knew. One little point of light. The person in a meeting whose story sounded so much like mine -- another little spark of light -- and who was willing to sponsor me. The people who kept showing up, kept the meetings going, and accepted my phone calls -- more twinkles of light. The family member -- not me -- who drove my sick, frail husband to attend a 12-step meeting for the first time in his life. A light that I thought was impossible.
All these things happened, and I did not directly cause them. To me, they are miracles. What is the higher power that caused this? All I know is that it was not me. I was just open to this light coming in because I was broken. It was proven to me that wonderful things are possible that are beyond my limited field of vision, and that if I ever feel hopeless in the future, such things can happen again.
Great reminder Freetime the more I reflect on the happenings of my life , the more I am convinced that HP was/is there guiding, inspiring and giving me the courage to keep walking forward. Thanks for your service
Thank you for your service, Freetime!
I like today's reading's use of the layer of fog lifting - of course, I grew up near a large lake, so fog lifting was a common childhood observation, and it brings back a lot of memories.
When I came to AlAnon, I had faith in a higher power, but not trust. Learning to trust has been like little twinkles of light for me. Trust for me now is easier - but I've had over three years of light accumulating, and I'm really able to see the fog lifting. Not so much because I cannot see the fog anymore, but moreso because it isn't as thick as it used to be, and I remember how thick it used to be
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Skorpi
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu
Thank you for your service and the daily Freetime. Thank you all above me for your shares and ESH. I remember when I first came, it was suggested that the first 3 steps are similar to:
1. I Came.
2. I Came to.
3. I Came to Believe.
This helped me see that any concept of a higher power - the group, the literature, the steps, etc. would be workable as we get to define/design our own, so long as it's not self. My concept has evolved in recovery, and I too can see the workings of a power great than I when I reflect on where I am compared to where I was.
It took me a long while to believe and accept that 'life' happens to everyone. There are no exceptions. We all have baggage we carry. Freedom from that comes to me from working the program as best I can, accepting life on life's terms and trusting that "what is" is what is supposed to be. Not always fun, pain-free or easy, but certainly worth it!
Happy Friday all - off to court with a friend this morning, then golf and then softball this evening. A full, busy, day - why not? Make it a great one!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I struggled with the Higher Power thingy....When I first got into recovery and got into the meetings, I saw "love in action" where did it come from??? what "spirit" was in these people who validated me?? comforted me?? accepted me as is??? I began to believe that the universe does have a "source" of all things good, kind, loving, honest, abundant, etc., I just had to make the move of becoming honest, open, willing, humble and to reach out....I had to reach out...I am a part of this universe and a part of it lives within me...
I still struggle with believing that I am going to be "OK" when crisis hits...in the past I was NOT "OK"...crisis back then meant more of me dying....now, I still hate and fear crisis (anything where I am powerless) but I CAN back off..step back...breathe....let the higher of me "catch up" with the lower of me (flight or fight) and if I listen, observe and wait, answers or options come to me.....I can always just walk away, let the universe do whatever it wants with an issue...i am "outta here" and when I do that, I usually get a sign as to what I can do......I hope this made sense, LOL....puppy got me up at 3am to go to restroom and had a crying night, breaking in to her new home and I am exhausted....I have 4 days off till work again, hopefully she will be more settled in by then...I am thinking she will...she is very adaptable..smart..willing...
You all have a great weekend....horse racing breeders cup this weekend....gonna be glued to the tube after work today and all tomorrow, watching this big event........
Thank you Freetime for your service, and to all who shared their ESH.
For some reason, this is speaking volumes to me today! I am going to copy/paste this where I can readily see it as I want to sit with this and ruminate!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
