The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Happy November to All! Today's reading discusses obsessive thinking, racing minds and tools we can use at difficult mind times. I love the quote:
"All men's miseries derive from not being able to sit quiet in a room alone." from Blaise Pascal
The reminder is also telling --- Sometimes I have to let go of a problem before I can find a solution. My racing thoughts may be making so much noise that I can't hear the guidance my inner voice is offering. Quieting the noise is a skill I can learn with practice. At first I may have to still my thoughts again and again, but in Al-Anon I learn that practice makes progress, one minute, one thought at a time.
The author compares the racing thoughts of the mind to a horse that refuses to obey the rider's command and races out of control. When we frantically try, over and over, to solve a difficult problem, we should stop. We can do this by deep breathing and embracing our surroundings. We can also replace obsessive thoughts with something positive - a slogan, the Serenity Prayer, or another comforting topic opposite of the problem at hand.
Stepping away or letting go for a while allows us to think about the problem differently with a more serene mind. Being able to look at a situation with a clear mind is a healthy part of recovery, allowing us to tackle problems with facts more than emotions.
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I have always struggled with being still. For as long as I can remember, it has been a challenge. I have to make conscious efforts to be still and listen to what my HP shows/shares. I will never perfect this and am content and joyful for progress! I am grateful that we have a variety of tools to use to help us calm our minds, take a break from 'life' and then consider the issues with a healthier lens.
For me, when I can pause long enough to get calm and centered, most of the issues I saw as catastrophic truly are not. Finding the real facts vs. my emotional slant of them helps me with decisions in a healthy manner. What I've tried to practice over and over again is to just stop/pause long enough to pray before proceeding. I am more mindful of my mouth, my body language, actions than before and taking the time to consider best next steps has resulted in way less chaos in my life.
Happy Thursday all - off to golf this morning - layering up as Fall is certainly here! Make it a great day!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I especially liked today's reading b/c I feel it is a great one, but especially for newcomers. When we are new, we go through stages. Oftentimes, we come to these rooms wanting others to change, not knowing that we ourselves probably need some changing as well! Then we hear and try to accept our shortcomings, but don't always know how to stop doing what we've always done!
This is one of those times that there are actually "instructions" on how to "do" this... ie: "We can do this by deep breathing and embracing our surroundings. ...replace obsessive thoughts with something positive - a slogan, the Serenity Prayer..."
I find this easy to read, understand and embrace. I really identify with "Finding the real facts vs. my emotional slant of them helps me with decisions in a healthy manner." I feel this is such an important thing to learn!
Coming off my sugar "high" from last night's festivities! I haven't really had sugar in over a month, so the next-day effects are really crazy!!! Today I am taking a moment to remember my loved ones who have passed... I really can't believe it is November already!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Deep breathing and embracing our surroundings.....simple enough to break hold of my racing thoughts and mental gymnastics....at least for a time to get centered again.
Thank you for todays reading, IAH. Every page has something to remind me that I am not alone and tools to help live a more peaceful life admist the chaos and uncertainty.
Thanks IAH and all above shares. I'm grateful that I spend much less time with racing thoughts than prior to program. When caught on that merry-go-round though, I can't think clearly. That's why finding slogans, the Serenity Prayer, or whatever might help, is vital to my calm survival. Always grateful, Lyne
This is my greatest challenge in life...Respond over react....letting go is the hardest...my thoughts race when I'm NOT under threat, imagine when a threat DOES happen.....to get quiet, I have to force me to STOP...BREATHE......and yea, the S prayer helps...focusing on something calming...centering in my body
racing thoughts have been my hardest issue to over come...dunno if I will ever overcome them as I have PTSD and GAD but I can and AM practicing the above steps....the "frantically try, over and over, to solve a difficult problem" that is me...going into a flurry of action....like treading water with flailing arms....I am trying to remind me daily, problems or no to breath and focus on my 5 sense.....asking me what do I see??? smell??? feel??? taste?? hear????? focusing on that helps.....
stepping away and backing off does help.....like i ask me during my journalling or sharing....WHEN do I have to act NOW?? right now??? imediately?? Not often.....99.9% of the time, I CAN step back...wait...breath.....do my mindful exercises...step back...let go....and yea, facts over emotions....observation over reacting....
thank you Iamhere for your service and share and for all of your shares on this. Here's mine :)
This is such a great page. I remember reading this early on in my recovery and finding it very helpful. When I first started in the program I HATED being alone in a quiet room by myself. Also funnily enough my office had moved and although I usually work in a field with a fast pace and lots of crisis it seemed that the office was very quiet. I was often in it alone with my thoughts and feelings and I wanted to crawl out of my skin. At the time I thought it was an awful change and I didn't know how I was going to cope with it. I am so glad I had this program. It turns out this change was a positive for me. I learned to enjoy my quiet time. I learned to enjoy peaceful moments. I had time to practice being at peace and it worked very well for me.
Now I work harder at trying to get to a peaceful place. I am more aware than ever before about racing thoughts and my runaway mind. I have learned not to make big decisions until I am in a peaceful place.
