The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hello MIP! Today's reading in Courage to Change is about breaking the cycle of worry and fear.
The author shares that when they focus on worry and fear, their thoughts can become obsessive, they can become relentlessly critical of themselves, and lose the ability to accomplish anything useful.
Focusing attention on the present moment is one way that the cycle of worry and fear can be broken. Focusing on the hum and pulse of everyday life, the lights, shadows, and sounds, rescue the author from "what ifs" and "should haves" and help to anchor them in the present. Prayer, meditation, slogans, and Al-Anon calls offer serenity and can bring us back to the present moment.
Today's Reminder: This day is all I have to work with, and it is all I need. If I am tempted to worry about tomorrow's concerns, I will gently bring my mind back to today.
Today's Quote: "The past has flown away. The coming month and year do not exist. Ours only is the present's tiny point." Mahmud Shabistari
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One of the things I like about Courage to Change is that it has a way of speaking to where I am today. I had a rough start to the morning, due to some dry drunk behavior I was exposed to last night. I was feeling pretty sad and sorry for myself. I felt at risk of letting yesterday's stuff prevent me from having a good day today. When I opened the reader, I found peace and serenity with my situation. I was able to let go of the pain that I had been holding tight and decide that by focusing on the moment, what is going on now, the people who are around me now, I can stay positive and, as the author suggests, have a useful and productive day at work.
I hope you make it a great day!
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Skorpi
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu
Good morning - thank you for your service Skorpi as well as the daily and your ESH. I was consumed by worry and fear when I arrived and it was hard to stay present. It took time and practice for me to see the reality of the past is unchangeable and the future has not been disclosed. When my mind wonders either way, I am asking for a disruption in my peace and joy.
This is an awesome reading and both the thought and quote speak to me. I am so grateful for recovery and the ability to practice using tools to change me. How my day goes is a choice now and not a given. (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Good Morniing Skorpi and IAH great inspiring reading for today. I know that prior to program ,worry and fear were my middle name as I did not have an effective tool to combat them. Enter program , attending meetings, working the Steps and living one day at a time I found that these painful constant companions left and have not returned. Thanks for your continued service Have a great day
I was always living in a heightened state of preparedness. Talk about raised cortisol levels!!! It all came from MY desire to manage my alcoholic spouse, and my fears of what my (and my kid's) future will be.
With Al-Anon, (tools, slogans, but especially members ESH) I learned a way to reduce the need to manage, and after that I worked on my fear of the future. Finally, I became strong enough to understand that enough was enough for me, and I am strong in body and mind to "go it alone."
I love the wording of '...focusing on the pulse of everyday life (today).' That is what I am doing today!
Thank you, IAH and Betty for your ESH... hope you all enjoy Hump Day!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Still going in and out of the fears etc. But, it is so much better than it was! Today is one of those days. Today I can do what is within reach. Do some small things to lessen the stress when it reaches overwhelming. For instance, reading your ESH's.
In reality, in life, these days/periods of time..... will happen. I just believe they will lessen in intensity as long as I am working a healthy program.
Silly things........I'm a coffee addict. Just for today, there will be only decaff in the pot all day. It's a small step but a good one. A needed one. Life happens and silly things like an unexpected dental visit (shudder at the thought) can send me thru the roof. I don't need coffee helping me bounce up on the roof.
Taking care of some calls for my hubby this morning/afternoon.
I am new here. I have struggled with Anxiety for many years. I thought it was an anxiety problem, then a self-esteem problem, and then a perfectionist problem that was causing my anxiety. I kept thinking, "I need a sponsor to help me!" My problem is going down the rabbit hole of worry-internet searches, reassurance seeking etc. Somewhere I saw that people with anxiety benefit from AA or Al Anon. My mom was raised by an alcoholic, and she herself has had problems with addictive eating. She has been in 12 step program for many years.
In finally googled Adult Children of Alcoholics and found that I check off almost all boxes with personality traits associated with Adult Children of Alcoholics.
I have just started with Al Anon, so today's reading hit home.
I know that my worrying, researching, etc. is unproductive, but once I start, I have a hard time stopping. The thoughts and fears become so real that it is like my mind has already decided that what I am worried about is true. As if it's already happening.
Once the worry feels so real, I feel depressed and hopeless. I appreciate any help that I can get with issue.
I read your posting- and then drifted away into a world of my own. That used to be my home. Death warmed up, Hellsville. But then guided by the almighty hand of some hidden force, I returned to this space.
i used to talk about 'the paralysis of analysis'. Also about being locked up between "if only" and "what if".
I can understand now the dilemma of the addict and alcoholic. Difference was i was trying to make it without anesthetic. learning to breath properly... taking care of each issue, one by one got me through. It seemed to take me all my life... and this angered me a lot- what a waste of life! What a blimmin waste of time!
But even this anger dissolved away.
Today I work two programmes- Alanon and ACA. I do qualify for AA too- but I put down the bottle at age 17. Not a lengthy drunkalogue. But Alanon was my home for 36 years, and still is.
I was told not to expect too much. Or, at least this was the message i seemed to pick up.
Things happened so slowly I did not notice the changes myself... i had to stop trying so hard, i was so desperate.
I would take great lengths to go to a meeting. All I need to do here is to walk over to the couch and put the laptop on my knee.
I made it here, as I describe in my first paragraph.
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