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I am again posting that my mom is in jail. Maybe I didn't post this before it has been a long time. My mom was in a mental hospital for awhile but now is out since last year. A new year was approaching & then this. She has misbehaved so many times in our small town. The police are tired of dealing w/ her here. She has over-stayed her welcome. The last time she was removed from a restaurant. This time according to the paper, she freaked out & was throwing pennies at people & really getting violent I heard at a bank recently. They took her to jail & she has been there for over a week now. She had a choice whether or not enter the bank. I guess the police really have had enough of this 74 year old woman.
I am now onto myself. Enough of my mother. Yesterday was my Al anon birthday. I didn't really get a chance to celebrate my 32 years. I am just grateful that I stuck around for the miracle. I haven't been to a meeting for a long time. We closed our meeting due to total lack of participation & a member basically abandoning our meeting. I guess when someone gets tired of holding the meeting together, we tend to let it go. I guess I could have eventually stepped in & rescued another meeting. Now there is one AA meeting that I might attend in the future. All I know for sure is that I am not an Alcoholic but the meeting is an open meeting. The problem I have w/ it is that I always leave there feeling worse than when I got there. And, this winter if I could I would leave early & save some of my sanity. I am sure this is not true of everyone. Where can I go to find serenity? I haven't been able to recover from some of those memories. This year, a new year is going to have to work better, one day at a time. I am trying to learn to complain less & be grateful more. I have tried several things to improve my outlook on life. It is not close enough to being positive.
So today I have to say that my Al anon birthday is an important day to recognize how far I have come. I really do think I still have the program regardless of my meeting attendance... and I plan to at least read the C2C daily & text my sponsor as well. Right now texting seems to work. We have been texting for several years & she live approximately 60 miles away.
Next time I get on here I hope to have done something different & smartly. I am working on me. I am grateful to all of you who have been through the worst w/ me. I am definitely still a work in progress.
Kathleen
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Hoot Nanny
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-- Edited by hotrod on Friday 5th of January 2018 06:42:36 PM
Happy Al-Anon Birthday Kathleen - I too am sending you positive thoughts and prayers. So sorry to hear about where your momma is - I readily admit that I did sleep better when mine were in jail. I at least knew they were safe!
Your one day at a time plan sounds grand....keep coming back - you are missed!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
There are similarities twix where you have arrived at with the program and where I am at now and then my relationship with the steps, traditions, ability to serve and my Higher Power are good. I changed home groups because mine closed and took in one on the weekend which is a "near noon" group. I don't have any complaints about that as the fellowship is still strong and mutually supportive. We have new comers who have come in, staying and growing in recovery. It doesn't get better than that. ((((Hoot))))...