The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's reading speaks to how some of us have such difficulty in communicating as a result of living with the disease. The writer mentions growing up in a home where he/she eventually just kept quiet because there always seemed to be misunderstandings otherwuse. The gentleness of Al Anon is one of the gfits of the program, in my opinion. There is no pressure about having to speak and share at meetings but there is always room to do so.
The first few meetings I went to I could only sit and cry quietly! I never would have attempted to talk- it was way too much for me emotionally. I always felt welcomed though, and could feel warmth and empathy in the rooms. I know it was because of this gentleness and patience that it wasn't long before I was sharing at meetings as well. The Thought for the Day at the end of this page reminds us that speaking too little can be as hurtful (to ourselves) as speaking too much. i would add that there is such freedom and relief in saying what we mean, meaning what we say, and not saying it mean.
Thank you for your service and your share, Mary. I've noticed I've become more honest with expressing my thoughts and feelings recently. It feels nice already, although I'm still learning, or re-learning, this skill. Turns out I CAN express myself honestly and manage navigating relationships - I used to hide my real thoughts very very often. Afraid of being wrong, rejected, etc. So grateful I'm getting better with this...
Happy Tuesday Mary - thank you for the daily, your service and your share. I was also quiet in the beginning as I did not want to show my pain and felt uniquely shameful and embarrassed by the chaos/drama in my family. My FOO kept secrets from outsiders, and we were taught to give the image of a 'perfect happy family'.
I was so grateful that others shared their ESH with me - I felt comfort in knowing I was not unique nor alone in the pain and destruction this disease causes. I now speak if I have something to share, and am one who believes that God speaks through all of us in the magic of recovery.
Thanks for your share too Aline - I can so relate and good for you that you see/feel your progress. That's all we strive for - progress, and not perfection.
(((Hugs)))
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
a reminder for me, to be present... not just getting my backside on a seat, but being aware and confident. This took time... but I was in a safe place at long last- where my time, and my thoughts, would be honoured...
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