The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
There once was a vivacious life loving beautiful girl, Jessica. Oh how she loved people, her job as a Pharmacy Technician and her favorite place on earth, Disneyland! She grew up in this area, just a few miles from her home. Her roommate worked at the Magic Kingdom as well. Her boyfriend! Her made her feel so good and she enjoyed his company as well. As her 26th birthday neared, plans were firmed up...a full day at Disneyland and dinner and birthday celebration at Downtown Disney. She added yet another pin to her growing collection known to Disney fans! At 2:30 AM, her Mother received a phone call asking if she has a daughter named Jessica. She had died. What?!!! Not hearing much above a Mothers wail for her child. Jess' boyfriend driving home ran head on into a eucalyptus tree, killing Jessica instantly, hours after turning 26. This Mothers only daughter was gone...dead??? How could this be?! Her boyfriend was arrested on his 3rd DUI. He will be arraigned on Murder 3. Her Mothers regret. Not teaching her daughter to Never get into a car with anyone who has been drinking. No matter what. Ever. The End
In Memory of Jessica
In hopes of good decisions made, for life. She would want that.
Alcoholism will continue to kill tose wo drink and do not drink, in cars and out of cars, with awareness and not. The will always be sadness and pain and the continuous opportunity to make things right honestly. ((((hugs)))) and prayers.
With his third dui sounds like Jessica knew he was capable of drink driving and made her own decision. I would say to that mother. You did the best with what you knew. You didn't cause it couldnt control it and couldn't cure it. I hope that mother gets peace.
The Mother is at total peace after shock wore off. She assigns her daughter with responsibility for her part, even in her phone call to me just a few hours after. Even before knowing of previous DUI's. Jess' BFF didn't know. So maybe she knew, or not. Point is. How many of us seriously thought of this when young, or naive to it. I was. I didn't drink or drug. I remember praying for safety getting home, even from a date. Wow! Learning moment to share.
Only a story to give pause for thought next time someone is riding with one who chose to grab a drink.. And a reminder to teach our children to stand firm in this decision. Possibly from our own example when we are young, married to an A etc.
I view everything with "what can I learn from this?". I find positive in negative. In everything as having a purpose.
Take what you need and leave the rest. In Peace....
-- Edited by IAmStrong on Sunday 19th of February 2017 05:31:37 PM
I agree LC I would suggest that mom search out alanon face to face meetings and attend . Here she will find peace and learn to accept her powerlessness.
As we've heard over and over again - alcoholism is cunning, baffling, powerful and deadly. So sorry for the loss of this young soul - I am quite certain she knew not to ride with another under the influence....we all hear this - parents, friends, school, TV, etc. The biggest challenge is denial - it won't happen to me, we're only going xx blocks/miles, etc.
Almost one year, I lost a nephew who was cruising with 2 friends. The driver (17) survived the accident, the other two (17 & 18) did not. It was 3:30pm - middle of the afternoon and they were not drinking, but under the influence of 'other'. They were driving too fast, went off the road a bit, over-corrected and crashed. It was an absolutely horrific scene and the photos haunt me often. The survivor has been convicted of 2 counts of vehicular homicide and is off to prison for 8+ years. His life is over as he will never heal after killing his 2 best friends.
The damage from substance abuse is way bigger than any of us truly know. We all have our own stories and then there are the countless others we're not aware of. It's always hard to loose someone, it just sucks when they are young, full of life/promise/hope and it was stupidity as the root cause.
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I find this "story" insensitive. You've reduced a person to a black and white example, littered with allusions to fairytales thanks to all the disney references and general cadence and it's not even your story to tell. How rude to a grieving mother. We will never know what was actually going on for Jessica, suffice to say, if parenting were as easy as telling your kids what to do, we would all be experts. I hope this young woman's mother finds wise kind counsel as she deals with her loss, even as i hope this was just fiction well meant.
