The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's C2C discusses tradition 5 which helps us set 3 goals- to work the steps, to have compassion for those suffering from alcoholism and to have compassion for others in the al-anon program. It points out how much love is involved in these goals/actions- working the steps is a huge act of love for ourselves, having compassion for our qualifiers whom we may have seen as the 'enemy' previously is also replacing negative intent and emotion with love and finally understanding and caring for others who are walking a journey that is in some ways similar (rather than being frustrated with the differences i might add) is again a loving thing to do and is affording others the same patience and love we have given ourselves in working the steps!
The reading suggests that when we love ourselves we become more able to love others and by loving others we become more able to love ourselves.
***
I know that when I first arrived at the doors of al-anon I thought the idea of being kind and loving to myself was fairly ludicrous- how was that going to make anyone else be kind or loving towards me? (Which was the aim, wasn't it?) yet that simple goal of learning to be kind to myself and working the steps for myself turned out to be completely transformative. And it did cause others to treat me more nicely, I guess because i wasn't projecting neediness and resentment at them anymore. I'm glad i decided to roll with it even though it made no sense to me at the time!
I have noted in recent times that I have become unfriendly and impatient. Perhaps it's the other extreme of how I used to be (ever loving doormat). This particular reading puts the why of being nice to others into a new perspective for me and I'm grateful for it. As usual the reading is exactly what I needed to read exactly when I needed to read it
-- Edited by MissM on Saturday 11th of February 2017 08:14:27 AM
Great reading msM,thank you for your service and daily reading.
It is just what I also needed to hear,like always ,exactly when I need to read it,
...........hugs lu
Good morning Ms. M. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this important tradition. I have found that the Traditions are extremely important to my learning how to interact in the world in a healthy fashion by providing me with principles that I can live by.
.This one in particular outlines Al-Anon's major tools. It suggests that we first work the 12 steps of AA for ourselves, then attempt to understand and encourage our alcoholic relatives, and then lastly support each other,
I know when I entered program I did not have any clue as to how to be compassionate and understanding of the alcoholic or others . Working the steps allowed me to let go of my negative self seeking attitudes and provided me with the ability to support others in a healthy fashion.
Extending that concern to myself first, was foreign to me because I thought that I should make myself invisible and others more important. The program suggests that "changed attitudes, aid recovery". i found that my attitudes towards love and support of myself and others needed a complete overhaul. I can see that this is why we need to work the 12 steps ourselves first.
