The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's reading in Courage to Change is a great read for reminding us what we are and are not responsible for. There is no quote or reminder - but instead a list of things we should consider as we work on our recovery program.
Most of us arrive believing we are supposed to take care of everything and everybody. We believed we had no choice as a spouse, parent, child, sibling, etc. Instead, with the help of Al-Anon, we learn that while we have responsibilities, there are many tings we do not have to do....
We don't have to understand everything.
We don't have to be reluctant to show feelings.
We don't have to feel threatened by the future.
We don't have to feel guilty about the past.
We don't have to feel alone.
We don't have to take responsibility for other people's choices.
We don't have to give up on hopes and dreams.
What a great list to consider and empower ourselves to keep the focus on us, our needs and our lives. I am one who literally believed the world would fall apart if I didn't do what I felt was my 'job'. How egotistical of me to assume that others would not or could not be responsible for themselves. Truly, as I look back, I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it - not a lot different than how the disease affects the thinking of the drinker.
I am grateful Al-Anon showed me a different way to be, live, think and do. I am grateful that I can progress at my rate and work to be a better version of me. I am grateful that Al-Anon showed me how to walk with my higher power - not in the lead or following, but with. Lastly, I am grateful for program friends and a sponsor who help keep me in check when I wonder or drift from my path.
Make it a great day all - it's super cold here and we've got some weather coming in. Stay safe if you're in the path of the storm!!
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Love this List of the "I Do Not have tos". Before program I was compelled to "Have to" do something about most of the topics on the list.
Attending meetings and working the Steps enabled me to let go of these destructive attitudes and replace them with the serenity, courage and wisdom of the program so that I could respond to situations as they presented themselves in the moment and in the day.
It is freezing here as well so stay warm and thanks as always for your service.
