The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hello I've been having trouble with my mother's drinking problems since I was probably 6 or 7. I never know what to do. she's been in therapy. she has a dui . In all honesty here I am just lost. I am depressed . I don't know what to do. Can somebody please help. She lashes out, she says horrible things my family and I. I know she's not always like this. I know she is sweet . But I just don't know what to do.
Hello Laura welcome to Miracles in Progress. I'm so glad you had the courage to reach out for the support you need. Alcoholism is a dreadful, chronic, progressive disease over which we are powerless.
I am sorry that you have been attempting to cope with this insanity from such early childhood. Living with the disease causes each member of the family to become negatively affected and require a program of recovery of their own. Al-Anon is that program. It is a worldwide fellowship and face-to-face meetings are held in most communities. The hotline number can be found in the telephone directory and I urge you to search out the support.
It is here that I was given constructive tools to live by and the ability to break the isolation caused by the disease. This then enabled me to regain my self-esteem and self-worth and live my life while still caring and supporting my loved one,
You are not alone and there is hope and help so please keep coming back.
Aloha Lola and welcome to the board...what courage it took to reach out and to name your Mom as you see her as part of your problem. I hope you don't feel guilty about that, it doesn't sound like you do and pointing a finger at our parents has always been fearful for me even when it was justified...I am much older than you I assume. Try this idea...that you have two female parents in your life...your mother and...your alcoholic. My parents and elders were very loving and caregiving until they came under the influence of alcohol which changed them terribly which is what alcohol does. So I had to come to understand which person I was with at various times whether my loving parent or my alcoholic and then to respond properly to either as I learned it in my program of recovery the Al-Anon family Groups.
This site, MIP is supported by many many program members...HotRod...Betty is one of them and has already offered some support. I am another and there are many more coming to your aid in time.
Apart of the Al-Anon Family Groups is the program Alateen made up of the teenaged family members. If you go to the white pages of you local telephone book and look for Alanon and call that number you can ask them if there are any Alateen meetings available for you to participate in. If they have any ask for numbers of members who can give you a ride to meetings if you have no transportation and if there isn't any Alateen meetings you can come to...go to Al-Anon for help.
Of course keep coming here for support also.
Welcome to the board and keep coming back ((((hugs))))
Welcome to MIP Lola - so glad you found us and so glad that you shared. I am sorry for the pain you are living with - as suggested above me, this disease is draining, painful and at times unbearable. I embrace all written above me for you, and just wanted to welcome you and tell you to seek support any place you can so that you can find help and hope - it's available to you!
Keep coming back and know that you are not alone!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
