The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
There was a challenge I saw on FB (I think) to participate in writing a letter a day for every day in the month of April and I accepted the challenge. Thirty letters in thirty days. I wrote on my calendar for the entire month who I would write to and I tried hard to stick to it. Only one day did I forget to write the letter so the next day I did two. I sent them to a myriad of family and old friends. Each grandchild who is old enough to read, my mother and mother in law, even my ex mother in law. Some letters were harder than others. But in each one I strove to tell the person how much they meant to me, the blessings they brought to my life and something I admired about them. Let me tell you, I was astounded at the responses I received. Some wrote me back, some did not. But most sent me some sort of message via text or a phone call to tell me how much that letter had meant to them. I think my kids thought I was dying or something!! The movie P.S. I Love You kept coming in to the conversation, I guess I will have to see it! But it made me realize how healing our words can be, and how necessary it is to let people know how special they are and how much they mean to us. I will be honest, my current mother in law was the hardest and she was one of those who made sure to tell me how much it meant to her. She said, "I don't know what I have done to deserve this". WOW!
I love to write letters and one a day was a little challenging even for me, but I plan to do this again. I may make every April my month to reach out and write those letters. But for sure, I will make the point of telling each and every one who touches my life, how very special they are and how important they are to my world. I would like to challenge you to do the same.
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Bethany
"Folks are usually about as happy as they make their minds up to be." Abe Lincoln
Bethany , I appreciate this positive update I too have found that treating others with kindness, respect, and appreciation works wonders. I feel 100 times better as a result and my relationships are enriching . I write a letter to my nephew and sister once a week and it is a great positive exercise .
I appreciate the challenge
(((Bethany))) - what a great challenge - kudos to you for accepting the challenge and taking the time to put so much love and positive energy into it. I miss the days when we wrote letters, notes, cards to others - it's so nice/fun to get that in the mail vs. bills and junk mail!
Thank you for sharing your experience! Truly cool if you ask me!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? (Lewis Caroll)
As I reflect on this challenge, I do believe that everyone who responds to posts on this Board and offers support and compassion is actually performing this wonderful exercise.
That is how/why alanon works. We support each other with non-judgmental acceptance, love, and compassion so that everyone grows. It is a win-win.
What an awesome thing you did. I'm sure all of the recipients of your letters felt truly blessed. I love writing letters too. I wrote one to my Mom recently, and it made her feel extremely special. I need to do that more often.
Thanks for the reminder, and thank you for sharing.
Bethany, congratulations on rising to the challenge and thank you so much for sharing the thought with us.
This is the first post that I've read on MIP this week because I am on holiday with two people I love dearly, my brother and his wife. It has been a challenging week for me because my sister in law is drinking a lot and I am beginning to experience her passive aggressive side. I have been wondering today how to reach out with love and let my brother know that how important he is to me, I will always be there for him and I would like to let my sister in law know that she has my love even though sometimes I have to step aside because I've been touched by the drinking of someone I love and so my capacity to just go with the flow ain't what it used to be!
And here you are Bethany, with a beautiful post that helps me to answer some of my questioning. Thank you for the message, I appreciate it so much tonight.