The material presented
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level.
My 24 year old son is drinking himself to death. I endured my husband's alcoholism for 30 years and now that he sees how badly his son his destroying himself, husband is barely drinking. I dont want to watch my son's drinking. I feel stuck and depressed. This has been going on for a year and a half. I am angry at my husband for raising son around alcohol. I want to move out. I am scared because I do so much for them. What if son gets worse or dies?
Welcome to the board this illness tears the people we love lb from limb as we watch powerlessly. However many of us here have been in your shoes and made the decisions that were right for our lives with the love support of al anon. We do not give advice only suggestion. You can take what is right for you and leave the rest. I would suggests attending al anon face to face meetings only people who have lived with an alcoholism can truly understand what you are living through. Good on you for reaching out for support the first step is the hardest. I hope you enjoy your first al snon meeting as much as I did I feel do loved and safe today al anon saved my sanity hugs Tracy ccc
((Marie))alcoholism is a chronic, progressive, fatal disease that can be arrested but never cured. We who live with the insanity of the disease become adversely affected and need a program of recovery of our own.
Alanon is that program. It helped me to develop new constructive tools to live by while i learned to accept reality and trust a Power greater than myself.
Your leaving isn't going to change much about his/their drinking...whether you are there or not the drinking is a consequence between them and the bottle. Alcoholism is about addiction; a compulsion of the mind and allergy of the body. Running from it is more usual than not by those who are affected by someone else's drinking. Running to the Al-Anon Program was the best thing I ever did even when I also ran from the addictive relationship my alcoholic/addict wife and I both had with the chemical. There are different ways of leaving. Both my ex-wife and I got sober and stopped running. I stayed in recovery and will continue to do so. Keep searching for feedback from the fellowship and I am glad you have found Miracles in Progress. There is an Alcoholic site which you can check into and read that is attended by alcoholics and addict. I encourage you to keep looking and participating. ((((hugs))))
Your story is similar to mine. I spent 20yrs with an alcoholic husband and I left him when major consequences came to my family and my eldest son went right of the rails. He too is a drinker and it was his drinking that left me powerless helpless and I surrendered. I have up and realised I needed help. I went to alanon, almost exactly 4 yrs ago now. I haven't looked back. I learned that all I was doing to help was actually harming and life threatening to alcoholics. Theyy need to fully feel the naturally occurring consequences of their drinking if there is a slither of hope of them recovering. For us this means stop all we do. No more cleaning and tidying up the mess. No more hiding the full extent of the problem. No more mothering them. Its killing them. So, you need to back off. Let go of the tight grip you have. Get to the nearest meeting pronto, learn this philosophy like it's the most important thing ever and maybe you can be one of the happy, free, spiritual people that live with alcoholism.
Welcome to MIP Marie - so sorry for what brings you here, but glad you found us. I am also glad you found your courage to share....
I don't really have anything to offer beyond what's been shared. Please keep coming back - you are not alone and there is hope in the program. Choose you - save you and put your trust in the program, recovery and HP. MIP stands for Miracles in Progress, and through this program, I've witnessed a few - miracles happen around us all the time!
(((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
