The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My exah is a dry drunk. He doesn't work the steps He says he has a HP but doesn't really do anything about. exah and current AH do not get a long. (No surprise there) Exah is notorious for changing plans and failing to follow through with his obligations to our children. My children 2 are adult and one is 16 know this and have accepted this. I have told others that I have accepted this about him but did I really? Today I realized that I hadn't and when the plans were changed 3 times in the last 24 hours I could feel myself getting upset. I stopped and started to say the serenity prayer over and over with my eyes closed. I went to church and the message was to give your burdens to your HP (God) and members of your flock (Alanon). I am powerless over the decisions my exah makes with his children. I have no control over him meeting his obligations. I have no control over how he makes his children feel. I can only control how I feel and how I react.......The wisdom to know the difference. So Just for today I am ok, I am not upset and I am not anxious because I know my HP is going to take this burden if I give it to Him.
Good job Suzann.......I believe you are truly at the point of surrender and acceptance. Just keep doing what you're doing and work on what you can control/change - you!
(((Hugs)))
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
That is the value of practice, practice, practice. We do not get to do this program just once...we do it daily and under many and various conditions. When I admit that I am powerless that clues me into learning more...getting more experience which don't go away. Keep on keeping on fooled...(((hugs)))
