The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I am different. I go against the norm and my brilliant ideas and understanding of things is too advanced for others to grasp. I tell the truth and people aren't ready for that! People are so dumb. I am glad I am so much smarter than everyone else.
It is not at all that I have problems fitting into groups and am working the "abrasive nonconformist" angle to avoid dealing with my issues and the real reasons people respond negatively to me. I am smarter, better, and more special than all of you so please take me seriously as I put forth this front to you on a daily basis! Thanks!
*I posted this bit of satire on an AA board but figured some of you might identify. Alcoholism is painful and insane...but to the degree it can be funny at times. I also know I have this giant ego inside myself and it wants to get out. Workin on it.
The dry drunks thought process-you described it perfectly! Mine also thinks she doesn't have a drinking problem because she has periods of not drinking. I am also always astounded by her denial, lying, and rationalization. My A lies any old time, about even ridiculous things like she didn't get my text. No wonder I got so sick! We had a new member last night in my F2F and she cried through the entire meeting and barely even spoke. Alcoholism, bah humbug, Lyne
This made me laugh, in a good way. I had to think of what the inner dialogue was on my side of the fence too. Something like:
"No one can understand what I've endured. My problems are so special and extreme that the solutions ordinary people apply to their problems would never work for me. They can't even understand that they can't understand me and the uniqueness of my problems. Also the love I have for my A is so great that it is bigger than any ordinary problems or solutions. We are not like those mere regular people. We are bigger in every way. It's too bad that they are so limited that they think their tiny silly solutions would work for us. I am so misunderstood."
As another double winner, I remember being in treatment so many moons ago and I kept saying, "But I can drink like other people. I can drink better than them. Much, much more and still be just fine. I choose to drink this way."
>>> Who in their right mind really chooses to drink to blackout each time sicker than sick the next day? Not normal smart people, just people like me - special, unique, etc....
I too need the reminder...
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
There is something there though with alcoholics and their being out of synch with society, norms, rules, other people, feeling like crap on the inside, but projecting a whole lot of garbage on the outside.
-- Edited by pinkchip on Wednesday 17th of February 2016 05:40:00 PM
I think on both sides there's also something about "I should not have to change for things to be better." WHY we think we should not have to differs, I think. But the fact that we are determined to keep on just as we are, waiting for other people to change, remains the same. Hence "If nothing changes, nothing changes."
I love your insights into the A mind, Mark. Funny and knowing. They also help me feel compassion for the complete stubbornness of my A.
Oh my gosh. I had to read that a few times. It's as if my ABF were writing that exactly!! He isn't even remotely interested in sobriety and still feels exactly this way. Wow.
Same dialogue, same disease, same behaviours, same faulty beliefs, same insanity. Theres a reason alcoholics and and alanoners get together. The solution is the same for all of us. Aa and alanon.x missed you pinkchip.x
