Don't know what I'd do without this board to come to,especially all of you for your esh and listening to me while I vent ,I feel like I'm complaining a lot I dunno,you all are all I've really got to share my feelings with and feel validated.im gonna have to do online meetings looks like cause I have night blindness I can't see at nite to drive closest meetings are 40 miles ,so online is all I got ,I've hunted for someone in my town to ride with but nobody comes from here.im gonna try and stay in touch with the sponsor of that group ,hone fully someone will eventually Come from here.thanks again for listening just neede to update,liveing this life is a rollercoaster ride for me .my 2 addicts that live here with me seem to be doing better than me most part,I'm the crazy ,bxxxx,it gets so confuseing and complicated liveing with this decease keeps me in a tizzy seems .thanks again I do need the tools for sure and qtip is a great tool to start with thank you John for giveing or reminding me of that tool,I do forget .  Hugs....lookingup