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Post Info TOPIC: bad weekend


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 2098
Date:
bad weekend


Thinking about my mother & all I did for her over these passed 6 months briging me to Decemeber, than things went to  hell in  hand basket... I neglected my 3 cats, my condo & myself all that ime & at the expense of  myself was there everyday of December... yet it was not enough.  I made her a spiritual notebook of which she had said she's nvr looked at.


I keep dragging those horses to water, throwing then in the lake & jumping on them,  they won't drink! Have to accept & resingn.  I can control & change myself, & it's all I can do &  is exactly what I am going to continue to keep doing!


just pretty sad, depressed over it, I have lost my entie famiy in 1 person, no father, no siblings but hey, I'm still here & hanging in there.  She doesn't want to hear my emotions, doesn't want to know me ~ I have had to accept this but it is still very painful at times, when I did what she wanted she treated me like a little princess & I miss that.  I thought all along we were close but i was just "unkowing."


-Kitty of Light



-- Edited by kitty at 13:08, 2006-02-27

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Light, Love, Peace, Blessings & Healing to Us All. God's Will Be Done. Amen.
leo


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 999
Date:

Hi Kitty remember happiness comes from within.  Your Mum has to find her own.  You are a wonderful daughter don't change your giving nature that is part of your beauty.  Luv  Leo x

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~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 2098
Date:

thanks for syaing that ((((Leo))))


all I can do is pray for her & let her go, I've had to stay away & stop giving to her, when I'm kind to her, give her a compliment she looks at me like I had 3 heads.  When I try to call her, she hangs up so fast I can't even tell her I love her.


I tell her in spirit, I supposed God gives her the message but as one who knows... if u don't love yourself, nothing is comforting or fulfilling, ur just never satisfied.  I've had to detach from her abuse to protect myself & get some strength of my own.  I love her with all of my heart but she keeps burning me... I have to keep some space for myself right now.


I surrender her to God & remind myself not to interfere with God's Divine Plans.


I cannot help her, emotionally mother her anymore nor can I save her or will she believe me when I say, I do not blame her for what's happened in our lives.  But she doesn't believe me, so I guess she blames herself.  There is nothing I can do to help her, all I can do is workk on me.



__________________
Light, Love, Peace, Blessings & Healing to Us All. God's Will Be Done. Amen.
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