The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hey everyone-Happy New Year to you all!! I have been away for a while but thought I would catch up.
Today I got a call from my husband saying he is going back to jail for driving under the influence. He has been awake for over five days and has been shooting it, too. So it wasn't really a surprise. I was going to call the parole officer this am, but I prayed last night and look what happened, he did it all by himself and I had nothing to do with his downfall. Thank you HP! He will be in for six months. He has called non-stop for hours but I won't answer. Can't afford it anyway. We paid the rent but don't have much left for the month. I already went to apply for assistance and will find out tomorrow if I can get help until I find a job. I told the children the truth after talking with the therapist. They know he needs the help with his problem, that he is getting better. What they don't know is that I am planning on divorcing him asap. I cannot do this anymore...
I am not feeling upset about it until I start thinking about he is going to feel. He will be crushed. But what am I suposed to do? Stay with him so that he won't be upset? If I listed everything that has gone on to upset me it would be ten pages long. I forgive him for it all, but does that mean I have to stay with him? Besides him being an addict, I don't love him anymore, if I ever did. I care about him but this is not a marriage that I would consider ideal. I just don't want to wait around anymore to see if he is going to get better. It's been almost ten years! I hope this doesn't make me wrong or a bad person to not stick by him.
I am sorry you're going through this right now, but at the same time I am happy that you are thinking of yourself and recognizing your HP's work in your life. Great job.
Isnt it amazing how our HP works.. Someone once told me to get out of the way so that the HP can work. It is easier said than done when you are as addicted to him as he is to alcohol. I am working to break my addiction to bad he isnt..
I am sorry that you are going thru such a tough time right now... Keep praying, asking for strength, guidance and he will answer.
Focus on you and your children and do what is right for you and your children.. Stop worring about his consequences they are HIS not yours..
Ah, Julie, you know that you are not a bad person. We have this thing in our society - I think it comes from watching movies - a good woman stands by her man through thick and thin.... If it makes you feel selfish to think about what is best for you, then try it this way - what did God put you on this earth for? What is your soul's destiny? You are a Child of God just as much as your husband is - what is God's plan for you?
You have a break now, time to think about what is best for you and the kids. I know you will end up doing the right thing.
Hi Jules your husband being in prison will give you clarity to make the decisions that are best for you and the kids. Reach out to HP for guidance if things get tough. Luv Leo xx
It never makes you a bad person to do what is best for you and your kids.
He has to suffer his own consequenses, not you.
Staying in a marriage where there is no love, doesn't benefit anyone, especially the kids. No one can know what is in your heart except you. You deserve a life, a chance to be happy and a chance for loved.
