The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
im so hurt right now by everything. my a didnt come home yet and its quarter after nine pm. its supposed to be our christmas together. im supposed to go out of town tomarow to see relatives but now i cant face them. i tried to talk about this in chatroom but felt like no one cares. what do i do? i literaally feel like i have no one right now. not even here. im sick of my life. i cant take this anymore
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stay in the now...dont look forward, dont look back....your life is what you make of it
Oh, it's so tough when the A doesn't follow through! And so disappointing! It sounds like you were really looking forward to your evening together. This kind of disappointment is tough any day but especially around the holidays. Your disappointment is so natural. Now what? What are YOU going to do to give yourself the holiday qualities that you want (joy, peace, merriment). Give yourself the best gift you can: a wonderful holiday for you. It doesn't have to be fancy or complicated--a nice bubble bath, a good book, etc. anything that feels good and right to you.
Take a deep breath and step back into looking after you.
I have learnt I can not depend on my A for my happiness. (Or anything else for that matter) Spend your holiday with your relatives as you planned, and consciously work at having a great time. Find the happiness and joy with your family.
Sometimes in the chat room I also find the bigger personalties can hold the conversation but don't take that as "not caring" - all the people here care very much about you.
Don't change your plans. You deserve to have a good Christmas. Make making you happy your number one priority.
I know it's hard, but depending or counting on an A is a recipe for dissapointment and hurt. Learn to count on yourself. Try and have Merry Christmas. You are special and you are important and you are not alone.
I know how you are feeling right now..it is so hurtful when the A makes promises and don't follow through...its like we want so badly to trust them, and once again, they let us down...I have not heard nothing from the A I have been involved with ..not a card or a phone call..but I am not going to let him ruin my holiday...he done this to me last year and I was so hurt.
Be strong, follow through with your plans and enjoy the day! ...Take care and hang in there!...
