The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My day yesterday was so frustrating I was in tears a couple of times, I hate my job and know I don't need this job but I do need a job. Then I tried to tell my self how selfish I was being ......questioning why am I being so ungrateful? Then my 18 yr old son called, he recently has started driving, (a week ago) I have felt the pressure lifted that I no longer feel the need to transport him to the Tech College in the morning....YEAH I was feeling free, yet hating my job.....then my son said "MOM?' I said what is going on.....he started crying ......I thought accident right away.....NOPE NOT AN ACCIDENT, my son went on to say his car caught on fire.......then I really started feeling selfish...my son was okay, but there went that hour in the morning.......my extra hour I just got back...the car is a loss, I was lashing out at him.....asking him "why were you where you were at that time in the morning, you should have been at school" then at my A "well, he didn't know to check the oil because neither one of us have ever told him to" then at the dog "WHY ARE YOU FOLLOWING ME AROUND" As I layed in bed last night I realized how lucky I am....
I have a job, a new one will happen when it's supposed to and as long as I am applying that is all I can do...
My son is safe, the car is a loss but maybe my HP is telling me to spend more time with him...
My dog is healthy and recovering from surgery she had last month....blessings,,,remember the blessings....
My A held his tounge....his is clean and sober 33 days....
I have to remember to explore below the surface of my anger....to discover what else going on....
Great job of keeping things in proper perspective. It helped me alot right now. I have to remember that it's not my initial reaction to stuff that really counts, it's how long I hang on to the negative crap (or get TOO up about the positive) that counts for my serenity.
I think it's right on key to look beneath the surface and see what is really going on. It's nice that you can keep things in perspective and count your blessings
Definitely HP at work. Today my son comes back from Tech as well and he will also be on the road by himself for the first time after 25 hours supervised driving. I can really relate to this. You actually reacted out of anger because he was safe. Hp is looking out for you, surrender.
