The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I used to not pray about much of anything, so I was skeptical of prayer when I started this program a few years ago.
When I did decide to pray, I did so privately. I didn't want to share with anyone about my attempts to have a relationship with a Higher Power, or my attempts to let Him handle what I was trying to admit I couldn't. There was so much I wasn't sure of. I didn't know how to pray, I didn't know who I was praying to, I didn't know if it would do any good. But in the name of "nothing changes if nothing changes," I tried it.
"If you pray, why worry? If you worry, why pray?" I hear that repeated in meetings a lot. I was sure it wasn't so black and white. There had to be some overlap. I've only recently realized that the overlap is where I hold onto pieces of what I am praying about, thinking it's somehow still in my control when it's not.
A couple of days ago I shared that I pray with my husband. He and I talk about a lot of things, but he is a God-skeptic, so prayer was not a topic I ever really broached with him. He had a work deadline it didn't look like he was going to meet because of a problem with some software he was using. He had been up for two days most of the night trying to make it work, and on the eve of his flight to present his results, he didn't have any results yet. He was frustrated. It was 2 am, and I was tired. Watching him try to figure it out, I decided I needed to go to sleep. I asked my HP to look over him and help him find a way. I told him I would pray for him, kissed him good night, and went to bed. 30 minutes later he crawled into bed next to me, said he had figured it out, the simulation would take five hours to run, so he could sleep for five hours (he hadn't been planning to sleep at all). The next morning the data was ready, and he still made his flight. "I said thanks to the Big Guy, but I don't know if he knows who I am,' he said.
I think he does. As for me, I learned again that letting go is th e answer. Plus I got to take one more step toward aligning the me I share with other people with the me I am with myself. It feels good not to have a huge gaping difference between the two.
That is awesome..and yes God does work in mysterious ways,but I am glad he looked over your hub that night..so h e would meet your deadline...That is a miracle...See praying does help..we just have to believe,and have a lil faith...I am glad you are letting go and letting god in your life..or something to that extent,but hey what do i know? im a kid...
Lauren~
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~life is like a box of chocolates you never know whatcha gonna get~
I'm amazed at the number of miracles I've been witness since really hitting the alanon bricks about 3 months ago. More miracles in 3 months than over 3 decades.
I think it's for alot of reasons. I'm more open to a relationship w/ my HP, I'm more apt to notice the miracles. And first and foremost, all of you my alanon friends are miraculous in your own way. There are so many Miracles in Progress here.
Bob
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You are a perfect child of God and God and I love you just the way you are! (added by me...in that special alanon way)
I have believed in an HP all of my life. I grew up in a very religious family. Since college though I have struggled, not really to believe, but maybe on just how much of my life he wanted maybe. For months I have had a really hard time praying too. I just am at a loss for what to ask for. I know what I want, but that's just it --it's what I want, not that I want selfish things, but I have a hard time saying "your will", because I just don't understand it.
I am trying to ask now and let go! Which is the hardest part. I wonder why I worry and get sick and I think you nailed it on the head--I ask, but I still try to hold on to it!
Thank you for sharing--that is exactly what I needed today!
