The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I just wanted to say thank you to all of you for your support. You have all given me a place to speak my mind about how I am feeling and I have also felt that this is the one place that i am understood. Yes, my A is going to rehab and I am happy for him. But what I feel most strange about is the fact that I really hadn't been worried about his safety. I am glad he is doing this for him. I have not been obsessing about his whereabouts in the past couple of months since the separation. I have taken it for what it was. I did feel duped when he firsttold me, but now Ifeel validated. His addiction is not my fault. It is not the result of my nagging or pleading it is the result of the fact that he is an addict. I have my own co-dependency issies that led me to him. I have realized that I have grown in the time I have been separated. And although at times I felt as if I could not let go, I have learned at this time that i have. I have had regular contact with him in this time and I'm sure the cut off from him when he goes in on Monday will be a change. It will be more time to work on me. To think about what it is I want in my life. I am not looking forward to his rehab so that I know that he is safe (i felt that a few years ago when i called the rehab crying and trying to get him in...I just wanted a break) it is b/c I know that the work can then begin for me first and then for him. I love him, I hope he gets it. But for the first time in my Entire Life I am thinking about KIM. Thank you all again for continuing to encourge me on my down days to cheer me on my good days and mostly for understanding the rollercoaster in between.
, that you are focusing on you. That is what you need to do.