The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
...words are more powerful than perhaps anyone suspects, and once deeply engraved in a child's mind, they are not easily eradicated. --May Sarton
How burdened we became, as little girls, with the labels applied by parents, teachers, even school chums. We believe about ourselves what others teach us to believe. The messages aren't always overt. But even the very subtle ones are etched in our minds, and they remind us of our "shortcomings" long into adulthood.Try as we might to forget the criticisms, the names, they linger in our memories and influence our self-perceptions as adults. The intervening years have done little to erase whatever emotional scars we acquired as children.
######ROSIE......i was called the most awful names.....my abuser called me a "born failure...idiot...jerk...bitch" i mean he did a *work on me* at some point in my little life, i *bought it*....i believed, i was a total reject!!!! i carried this all my life....it even went to suicide attempts....i wanted to "get rid of the reject"!!! and , sadly, i perpetuated the "born failure prophesy" just one failure after another....so i drank to numb my pain.....i was SO scarred SO beaten SO defeated......thank God i got into recovery!!! its been a REAL turning around...
Our partnership with God will help us understand that we are spiritual beings with a wonderful purpose in this life. And we are as lovely, as capable, as successful as we perceive ourselves to be. Our own thoughts and words, our own labels can become as powerful as those of our youth. It takes practice to believe in ourselves. But we can break the past's hold on us.My higher power will help me know the real me. I am all that I ever needed to be; I am special, and I will come to believe that.
######ROSIE......i know NOW that i did NOT come into this earth for "his pleasure" ...i merely got into "evil's way"...that is all....it had NOTHING to do with me!!! it was NOT my inventory.....NOT God's plan for me!!!! i was derailed, but the program put me back on track....every day, i play my cd's / tapes i call them my "i love me" tapes....overwriting his abuser values with the light/ and the truth.....i am PRACTICING the art of **loving me* isn't that something???? i have to "learn/ pracatice to love me" something so basic!! but, whatever, i am working now on the solution....what's done is done......if he can mess up my mind with is "hit or miss evil" IMAGINE what i can do with a *concerted* effort to love/ accept / nurture/ honour ME!!!!! i look to my HP to help me "BE THE REAL ME"!!!! as i discover me, i am so pleasently shocked!! the poor hopless/ pitiful/ despaired creature i was is going away and giving way to someone who is hopeful/ positive/ loving and healing!!!!! thank you DONE
It was once explained to me, that "words can be used for two things, and two things only - to either 'build up' or 'break down'....." When I heard this, it was in the vein of Christianity, but I also think it is applicable in all aspects of life...
I still try to remember this, even today, as I work my way through things.... Even when posting, it is easy to go "too far", and my words can offend.... I am still, very much, a "work in progress"...
Tom
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"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"
"What you think of me is none of my business"
"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"
