The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
"We did not choose to become addicts."Basic Text p. 3When we were growing up, all of us had dreams. Every child has heard a relative or neighbor ask, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Even if some of us didn't have elaborate dreams of success, most of us dreamed of work, families, and a future of dignity and respect. But no one asked, "Do you want to be a drug addict when you grow up?"
######ROSIE....oh this is so absolutely true.....i think maybe this is why i was so angry/ resentful about my life!!! cause i had NO choice!!!!!! i am sure when i came into the world, i was full of hope/ joy/ dreams/ ambitions....husband/ children/ a farm where i could have some of my quarter horses/ raising dogs.....AND ....i was a budding child actor...writer...when he began the REAL bad stuff........my *plans of the future* did not include 8 years of being incested AND programmed by constant insults that i was **gonna be a failure*.......that definetely was not in my *plan*
We didn't choose to become addicts, and we cannot choose to stop being addicts. We have the disease of addiction. We are not responsible for having it, but we are responsible for our recovery. Having learned that we are sick people and that there is a way of recovery, we can move away from blaming circumstances - or ourselves - and into living the solution. We didn't choose addiction, but we can choose recovery.Just for today: I choose recovery.
#######ROSIE....no, i did not choose, nor did i choose to drink/ do tranquilizers to numb my pain...become a severe codependent!! .........however i can choose to OVERCOME....i can and DID choose to get BACK my life!!!!! i am doing just that!!!! i have the disease of codependency which to me, is the root of all addictions...just my take, but it sure looks that way.....i wasn't responsible for my disease/ injuries, but i am now responsible for my recovery and i work it hard!!! almost non stop in some fashion or another.....i want my LIFE.....at any price!!!! i want to be free/ healed/ living abundently/ after recovery work, one of the biggest things i do to reverse the evil done to me is to spread hope/ strength/ love to others......i try to use this to help others....that way it puts SOME meaning onto what happend to me....the *girl/woman interrupted* so brutally.....and i too, accept that i have a disease......i can overcome it or let it defeat me.....i CHOOSE to overcome, to love me so i can spread love to the universe!!!! to share my hope/ strenght with others so they will try *ONE more day*.......so just for TODAY....i choose recovery!!!!!! thank you DONE.....
"Every child has heard a relative or neighbor ask, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Wow! This question would send me into an inner anxiety attack ever since I was 5 and even now, it makes me feel trapped in a corner... I don't want to be valued on what I am or am not doing & I want to be able to do *many* things. I guess my answer is everything & nothing... whatever wonderfully creative thing I feel like doing that moment!
"I have the disease of codependency"; "I CHOOSE to overcome, to love me so i can spread love to the universe!!!! to share my hope/ strenght with others so they will try *ONE more day*.......so just for TODAY....i choose recovery!!!!!!"
My Soul Sister, I am right here with you on this... I spent the last 6 years, sub-consciously blaming my ex(addict/husband) for 'ruining' my life -- what a pathetic, hopeless lost soul I had become -- I am grateful that my dad got caught cheatting, this has woken me up back to reality, to realizing that I was ALLOWING myself to be abused, even & especially by myself!
Kitty* I will not tolerate abuse in any form any more - I now what is "right" for me, I am becoming more & more sensitive to it each day - to recognizing when someone is trodding on a boundary of mine, stopping the hysteria, not jumping through other's hoops. I am slowing down, listening to the intuition god gave me so that I may hear the voice of god & have the courage to act on the truth. I may not always know what is "best" but if I pray to HP & listen, the answers of the highest order come into my mind.
God always has "my back" & I have given up the false-belief that I can know all. When I was 18, I prayed to be put into the fire spiritually (over & over again) since i prayed for god to take me & it never happened I prayed for knowledge -- boy did I get some extreme lessons & THANK GOD! I now know what I do not want, which is huge! In that same vein I am getting better at setting boundaries each day & nipping the bullies in the bud... I'm not falling for it, some may not know what they are doing but I can fall back on god every moment & that is what god wants me to do, continually surrender in humility.
Rosie, I love your shares, you always make me think of something new or remember something old. The more one is aware of, the more awareness we are able to perceive, tyVm!
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Light, Love, Peace, Blessings & Healing to Us All. God's Will Be Done. Amen.
