The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I hate posting when I feeling crappy, cause I hate to bring everyone down... could that be a defect? I am always encouraged when other people post their tough times, cause it shows me that I am not alone....
Alone...
I am feeling SO alone in this new big city. I have been here for 4 months, and haven't gone to one f2f meeting. I am finding all kinds of excuses, they are too far away, I can't take time away from my kids, the house will get out of control, the hubby can't so 2 hours with the kids alone, i don't know anybody... need I go on?
I have been finding of late that my program is almost a shadow. I still hang on and use some tools daily, but the peace of mind, contentment, and serenity that I had when I made the decision to move here has slowly diminished.
H.A.L.T - Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired...
I feel all the above.
Someone pray for my rescue... Pray that i will suck it up and get my arse to a meeting...
Start small, start doing your daily readings, your journaling, etc. then find a meeting and go. Yes you have had a major change in your life, but what are you doing for you? If you don't take care of yourself then who will? I believe when I am working my program hard and regularly, I am a better person for those I spend time with. When I eat right, do some exercise, sleep enough, I have more energy. I hope this helps.
Hello Cap - sorry your having a rough time but u know what to do about it. Feeling sorry for yourself just dosen't work , and that pity pot gets reallllllllyyyyyyy comfy some times.I remember it well and for me it is one of those things that I promised to NOT do to myself anymore.
Encourage yourself as u would others in your position , find a way to get to that meeting , take the kids if you have too , you said you are in a large city pretty good chance that u would find a day time meeting. Do what it takes cap your worth the effort.
Perhaps there is a reasonably priced hrly day care in your comunity where the kids could go while u take in a meeting. often churches operate drop in day care- make a few phone calls and see what you can do . Once u have experienced the program , alone is a choice - so suit up and show up .
You did the right thing by reaching out to us :) It seems to me that you know what you need to do and have that figured out. It is so good to see you posting on the board. (((((((((((((((Huge supportive hugs)))))))))))) Face to face meetings do help sooooo much. They may even have day care if you call and find out. Otherwise, you can sure pm me here on the message board and vent or just keep in touch. Your friend, cdb
Baby steps Capt.... take your recovery program one day, or one hour, or one minute at a time, if that is what you need to do.... As far as feeling guilty about posting when you are down - that is part of the "power of we" that we can all provide for each other.... Together, we are stronger than alone.... when we are really down, we can often get lifted up by someone else's fresh perspective on things, much like we can do for others when they are needing it....
You know what you need to do.... remember that you can't eat an elephant in one bite... the proper way to eat an elephant is in small, digestible bites...
Take care
Tom
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"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"
"What you think of me is none of my business"
"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"
It is so hard to pick oursleves up when we let ourselves down. Big changes, fresh start. You need to wake up in the morning and decide that today is for you.
Read, think possitive and start back up, don't worry about how long you have stopped, every new day is perfect to start taking care of you again.
This is not meant to sound trite. But I truly believe that noone is really lost. We just lose direction. We need a compass to guide us. That's what we're here for. We're your compass.
It's about baby steps. You'll find the strength again. Just dig a little deeper. In times of great adversity, there lies within us huge amounts of strength that we didn't know we had.
Take a deep breath. Look outside and relish in the beauty that surrounds you. Enjoy the simplicity of seeing a squirrel frolic. Ever see one fall from a tree?
Be good to yourself. Don't be so hard on yourself for not doing what you think you should be doing. Sometimes we're our own worst enemies. I know I am.
We're here for you. Sending you (((hugs))) and prayers .
Live strong, Karilynn
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
I can really relate to your post. I recently felt like I was in a similar rut (different situation, similar feelings, I think). Then when I finally got my butt to a meeting and shared about it, I was practically in tears but I felt better. At the end of the meeting some people I hadn't seen in a while came up and told me how much they had missed me and how much they could relate to what I had said. What a GREAT reminder that we are never alone, and that no matter how we are feeling we have the experience that can help ourselves and one another if only we open our mouths and share it. Pray for the strength to do something different today. When I do that it often gives me the get-go to take the next step for myself :) You're in my thoughts.
If you don't take care of yourself then who will? I believe when I am working my program hard and regularly, I am a better person for those I spend time with. When I eat right, do some exercise, sleep enough, I have more energy. I hope this helps. 
.