The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Having been thoroughly and formally reprimanded for asking for financial assistance through the board, I humbly apologize to the entire community of the board for having asked for financial help in this manner at all and will not do so again. I am still pursuing employment so that I can finally fulfill 7th Tradition and be happy in my work.
Now to other matters...
The psychological report I had been waiting for has finally come. No surprises there, as most of the abuse was either too dangerous for me to document or was done in such a way that the perps couldn't be touched. I have a wrap-up appointment Thursday at 1 pm.
I am seeing the reverse-Cincinnati angle work in my favor now. I need to establish bonds in the community at large first, then serve Al-Anon later.
The happy hour food idea is paying off. The server at Kells turned me on to their curry and chips, saying it was his favorite. I loved it and will go back next Monday for an encore. As Monday Night Football wil be really good next week, even more reason to go!
I went out to Southeast 82nd Street--Asian food heaven-- for dinner Saturday night. When all 3 major papers (Oregonian, WW, Tribune) give a place rave reviews within a short time of each other, it's time to check it out. The restaurant is called Bun Bo Hue, and is named for a spicy Vietnamese soup. It's in a part of town that isn't the greatest after dark, and you can't see the restaurant from the street. I ordered the bun bo hue medium and my nose was soon running with world-class speed. If you value your life, don't order the hot. $7 for food that good? You bet it was worth it!!
Throw out the money problems and I'm enjoying it here. My cousins don't understand that it's better out here. What part of "no sales tax" do they not understand? <evil grin>
Apology accepted even though I think you did nothing wrong :) I think you should write a book about your situation by being homeless. You have come up with so many creative ideas to survive on very littel money that it would probably be a best seller :) Think about it my friend. Many positive thoughts and prayers are going out to you! I know HP has something big in store for you! The harder we suffer, the more we are blessed later on. Not sure who said that,,,,,,me I guess :) Speaking from experience is all LOLOL. Your friend in recovery, cdb :)
Thank you for your open acceptance and apology. I was the one who raised the issue, both with yourself and the board facilitators. I appreciate your quick response to this matter, as this board needs to be focussed on Al-Anon principles and a "safe" environment for us all, in every sense of the word.
Take care.
Tom
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"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"
"What you think of me is none of my business"
"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"
(((Hax))) No need for apology to me :) I think sometimes ya gotta do what ya gotta do. Everyone's always saying to "do the footwork" so HP can do the rest. You did.
Granted, if I didn't know you I may have seen things differently. Glad I do though. Keep keepin on Hax!!
Christy
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If we think that miracles are normal, we will expect them. And expecting a miracle is the surest way to get one.
HI Hax, I wrote and asked the main person to please allow you to stay here with us.
Hey we all make choices sometimes that we did not think thru. No big deal.
You know who the people are you can ask for help from. There is no reason you cannot ask people privately. I don't negate your need or am uncomfy asking me privately.
I have to demand that you cease asking for donations from the MIP members immediately, via any medium. While we all understand you needed some financial assistance in the beginning of your relocation endeavor, it is appearing to many of us that you are attempting to take advantage of the generosity of our members.
You have repeatedly sought financial contributions since August 16th, 2005, and when not being direct in your request for donations, you have repeatedly told your story of woe in such a way as to indirectly solicit donations from MIP members who feel sorry for you and your situation. However, not one MIP member thought it was a good idea that you relocate to a place where to you had no housing arranged, no family, no friends, and no job. This was a decision you made and MIP members should no longer be placed in a position of feeling sorry for your decision, or asked for funds to support you or cater to your housing, transportation and food needs. The community you are in most likely has resources that are available to you and that is where you need to seeking them.
MIP members are caring, compassionate, generous people. They tend to respond to the needy. However, in a effort to protect them from being soaked of financial resources they may need for themselves and their families I am demanding that you cease utilizing any MIP member as a financial resource, via our message board, in our chat room, via emails, telephone, pm’s or other private messaging tools.
While I have no idea what members have sent funds to you, or how much, and nor am I insinuating that the funds you have received were not utilized for the purpose you have stated, I must, for the benefit of every one here at MIP, share a story that unfolded about 2 years ago as a result of the same conduct by a well liked member of MIP.
There was a woman, who was in our room, sharing that her electric was about to be turned off. MIP members responded, and donations were sent to her. She had a 211.00 electric bill, and received over 1000.00 to cover it. Not once did she indicate to anyone inquiring as to how they could help her that she had received the funds and no longer needed them. She kept accepting the funds as long as they were forthcoming, but under the same false pretense of needing them for her electric bill. The following month, she wrote on the message board, that her telephone was being turned off, and without it, she couldn’t attend the online meetings and without them she would have no support. Again, the donations flowed. Her phone bill was 340.00, and she received over 800.00 to cover it. At no time did she indicate to someone wishing to help her, that she had received enough to cover that expense from the very first person that provided her with the phone bill funds. Next, it was a story of how she was loaned a computer from her church but the church needed it back and with out a computer she couldn’t get the support she had found on MIP. Three MIP members paid for and sent her three computers! Turned out that the church had given her the computer she was using, it wasn’t ever loaned to her and they had never asked for it back.
It doesn’t take long for a group of people to find out when something is being done that doesn’t appear to be appropriately accounted for, so MIP members called her electric company, her phone company and her church, then got together and compared notes of who sent how much. This is when it was discovered that she had been soliciting un-needed funds under false pretenses and utilizing them for 2 months from a large variety of MIP members. Needless to say, she has been banned from our site permanently.
As a result of this situation;
Contributions sent to MIP from its members are utilized to cover the expenses of MIP, and its surplus is utilized to help individual MIP members when appropriate and needed. A group member can send an email to me (John F.) or the MIP board president (Pam L.) and let us know that a MIP member is in need of some financial assistance and after having verified the existence of the need, MIP will send funds directly to the party that is to receive them, not directly to the MIP member. This ensures that only the funds needed to cover the need are solicited and they are utilized as stated. While we like to keep this activity private, and as a random act of kindness to dedicated MIP members, I can state that funds have been provided for recovery books, partial rent payments to cease an eviction, utility bills, Christmas gifts for children in a alcoholic household, school clothing and supplies for children in alcoholic households and food item gift certificates.
I ask that all MIP members who would like to make a contribution to help an MIP member in need send the funds directly to MIP, as outlined on this site, and indicate on it a statement of “MIP Member Need Fund”. I ask that you refrain from sending any funds to any individual for any reason, to reduce the potential for excessive indulgence of our generosity by any individual or group of individuals.
(omitted), please understand that this is not an indictment against you personally, but a clear statement of policy that needs to be adhered to for the sake of every one on the MIP site, both the giver and the needy.
Yours In Recovery,
John F.
MIP Founder and Webmaster
-- Edited by John at 19:37, 2005-10-06
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" And what did we gain? A new life, with purpose, meaning and constant progress, and all the contentment and fulfillment that comes from such growth."
