The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have an item for the next business meeting if I am unable to attend. Often newcomers are looking for online sponsors. I was wondering if after the scripts have run before we ask for topics if the Chair could ask by a show of hands "!" if anyone is willing to be a temporary sponsor. This is what happens at my F2F meetings.
We often express to newcomers to come to quite a few meetings to listen and learn to see who's really working the program, who's been in program for a bit of time, and who actually have sponsors themselves but I think this may help those who are ready for a sponsor to know whose shares to watch for a bit to see if they are someone willing to be a sponsor.
7th Tradition
Also, I believe, though have been unable to confirm, that we've got a paypal system set up for those who want to make contributions for this website's expenses. Does anyone have an update for this? Again, perhaps before the closing scripts close, we could mention the 7th tradition and explain what those who can contribute can do.
What do y'all think?
Maria123
__________________
If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
Great suggestions to both. I believe that at one time there was some suggestion about the possibility of adding some kind of 7th tradition reminder to the scripts or to be announced at meetings....but the issue was tabled and I havent seen it resurface...to my knowledge at least.
Paypal is working, I have used it. On the top right of this page just click on the credit cards images and then on paypal donate on the next screen. You will need to have a paypal account to do this, but can register for one if you do not already have one.
I dont think a temp sponser is a good thing not in my experience. I had 4 sponsers and some werent available as i needed. A temporary sponser is someone who does it while you are finding one, someone who doesnt want to be a full time sponser. With the experience i have had with sponsers and im not putting them at fault in any way i had alot to do with it also. But in my opinion a full time sponser is what newcomers need to feel accepted and welcomed. The sponsor could end her relationship at a time where the newcomer needs him or her the most. Just giving my opinion lol. I really think that newcomers and ones that dont have a sponser since it is extremely hard to ask someone for fear of rejection. That finding a permanent one is the way to go. In my own opinion hope no one is angry hope you are not angry from this post i wrote maria just my experience and opinion on the topic :) no offense intended love ya
kerry
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Life can only be understood backwards, But it must be lived forwards
David thanks for that information. I just learned that today about pay pal, but perhaps we would see increased donations if we let others know about this "pay pal" feature during the meetings. Just a suggestion
Kerry, thank you also -- I am not angry one bit by your post . I always appreciate new perspectives and I understand where you are coming from.
Let me clarify two points 1) a temporary sponsor can be helpful in two ways -- one, often temporary sponsors evolve into a sponsor that is willing to work the 12 steps -- remembering that this is a two-way street and 2) in my opinion a temporary sponsor is good in that sometimes, for many varied and sundry reasons, the sponsor does not work out -- not badly, but just didn't work. Trust is built upon bit by bit with a sponsor. As Haxi says, it's pretty easy to identify the frauds LOL. But anyway, if a temporary sponsor is not working, then it would serve two purposes -- a nice easy, clean way to say thank you for your service and move on and for the sponsee I believe it will give them a foundation of sharing that they can continue to build on with a more appropriate 2nd sponsor.
At any rate, we could also say, for the sake of discussion, is anyone willing to be a sponsor? and leave the word temporary out? I just think that often there are those looking for sponsors and this gives them and the rest of us an opportunity to evaluate our time commitments and see if we have the time for service work.
Again, thank you both for posting. Much appreciated.
Maria
__________________
If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
I too have seen the link David mentioned on the al-anon page and have used it via paypal. I made a note in it that it was for this site and I am a member of al-anon so there was no confusion where it would go. I agree both topics are worth mentioning. Thank You, Tea2
great suggestions maria! Got me thinking too, i know. it's scary.... but i was thinking another idea could be for a sticky post (one that stays on the top like John's 2) on the board with a list of names for temp sponsors and a explanation of what a sponsor is and how they can contact them. That way, they have all the info right there on the person, all they have to do is click their name and they can see all the previous posts on the board that person wrote and can send them a private message too. Just an idea of course.
i really think the 7th tradition should be brought up in the scripts too, when we're in f2f we pass the basket... why not in here too right? Here again, just my opinion.
When i was asked if i'd sponsor someone, i offered to call it a tempory sponsorship for the first 30 days or so to let her take my type of sponsorship for a test drive if you will. That relationship is no longer temporary, but life long now. When I first came to alanon i didn't just want a sponsor, i NEEDED a sponsor. Having a tempory sponsor filled that need when i wasn't sure yet if i wanted to stay with alanon. I had someone to turn to when i was in so much hurt. It got me started on the program i work today, got my steps going and got me to meetings to meet that person there. There was no commentment, no have to's, i wasn't stuck, but rather i had someone there for me when i was a newcomer and needed it most to guide me untill i knew what i wanted in a sponsor exactly... I still use that sponsor today to help me and love that person bunches and bunches although i have found someone else to be my permenant sponsor who was more like me. I now have 2 people that i truly trust with all my garbage and can turn to for e s &h when i need it. How awesome is that?
