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Well, he called this morning after asking him to leave me alone. Asked if I had called him (I hadn't). I said "No" and merely stated that while you're on the phone I would be going to the DMV today and needed the info on the car. (VIN# etc). He didn't have it and would call his uncle to get it off the car. He was to pick up some things from a friends house tonight, I said fine. He continued to ask if I still did not want to talk to him that he would respect that and that he is merely angry with himself because he feels like he may have blown it this time with us (ya think?). I said "you have" and hung up the phone. On my way to DMV I called for the VIN#. He continued to state that he knows he has a lot of work to do and has hope that this isn't really over. I made it clear to him. I do not want to "date" you (this was his bright idea the last few weeks) talk to you or have ANY kind of relationship with you. GET SOBER. Then we'll talk. I do not want to know when you're high, drunk, having a hard time, gambling or whoring. Live your life. Do not involve me. The past month I have slowly attempted to put my life back in order and concentrate on me. Any and all calls or cries for help now will fall on deaf ears. My inlaws are another case in point. It seems as if when my husband relapses they rally around to point the finger at me. I had made a phone call to my mother in law in a fit of anger (my mistake)after he had stopped payment on the check to say "I can't bleive that he is doing this? What kind of a man does this to his wife?" Well, apparently, my mother in law who is emotionally inept, had to go to the emergecny room becuase she was so upset. If I wasn't the bitch that keeps him from having fun before, now I am the bitch who sent his mother to the emergency room. Never mind the fact that they encourage his behavior...my SIL and BIL gamble with him. My other SIL and BIL smoke pot with him. When the sh** hits the fan, however, they want no part of it want to be left out of it and continue to encourage him that I am somehow evil. I told my husband today that my disgust is not merely with him. I am one small person that when this happens I am up against a gaggle of addicts. And if they want to encourage you in your pursuit of destruction, they can take care of you. And that was it. I'm just muddling along here, but I keep going.
I am seeing that the ride is slowing down, and you should be happy with the progress you are making. I know how incredibly hard this is for you (for anyone)
I made it clear to him. I do not want to "date" you (this was his bright idea the last few weeks) talk to you or have ANY kind of relationship with you. GET SOBER. Then we'll talk. I do not want to know when you're high, drunk, having a hard time, gambling or whoring. Live your life. Do not involve me. The past month I have slowly attempted to put my life back in order and concentrate on me. Any and all calls or cries for help now will fall on deaf ears.
Hi Kim
GREAT WORK getting on with your life.
GET SOBER then we’ll talk. I intend to use that one when my alcoholic husband calls me.
Mostly I don’t pick up the phone.
But when I do it is right back to the INSANITY of talking to someone that is actively addicted.
I needed to hear this today.
Thanks for posting this.
In recovery
megan
__________________
Megan
If you want things you never had you need to do things you have never done