The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
*******this is taken from a "language of letting go" daily reminder, my take
The Freedom of Surrender
This is the surrender step. Once we surrender, we become free to take care of ourselve, with the assistance of our Higher Power.
#####ROSIE....i have been having dificulty with the "surrender" thing...i think to me, it triggers me because of the connotations that i am giving myself up like i had to with the perp...to get around this and to realize that i cannot do this (recovery) alone and unaided...i use the word "cooperate" with my higher power or "alignment" with my higher power...that way i am not giving my self up, but becomming in sync with my higher power.......i am accepting that i cannot recover without the help of the "source" the "universal healing" so i am WILLING to "cooperate" with it....
Surrender does not mean we are helpless. I doesn't mean we surrender to abuse or intolerable circumstances. It means we acknowledge circumstances, then ask God to help us take care of ourselves in these circumstances.
#####ROSIE.... i know "surrender" is a trigger word for me so i get around it by doing what i can do...i am OPEN to new perspectives/ perceptions, .....i like this, ACKNOWLEDGING circumstances which to me is "accepting the facts/reallity" and making the best of it AND turning it/us over to our HP , that part which we cannot handle, and YES, looking within me so i can take care of me in these circumstances.....this i can "grasp" this description of surrender i can grasp...i don't know WHY the word "surrender" brings up bad feelings for me...well, i think i know why, but i don't think the perp actually used that word.....
We will learn how to say no; how to set boundaries; how to listen to our feelings, wants, and needs; and how to respond to others in a responsible, loving way. We will learn how to respond to external circumstances in a reasonable way, one that exhibits self-care, self-love, and respect for others.
#####ROSIE....i can say "NO" and i have set good boundaries where i need to...i am doing better at listening to my feelings/ wants/ needs AND i think i do better responding to others in a healthy/ loving way....external circumstances i think i do better with in that i do what i can do, and leave the rest....i am looking at the INTERNAL (the being part of me) more than i used to...i had shut down the INTERNAL part of me which is my (being/ feeling/ etc) and i focused on the EXTERNAL part of me which is mostly the "doing" part of me....now it is in better balance.....
Surrendering is how we become empowered to take care of ourselves.
#####ROSIE....yes, "alignment" "cooperation" with the SOURCE of it all...not fighting and protecting, but "going with the flow" and NON resistance..i am working on it...making progress
Turning our will and life over to the care of God takes the control of our life away from others. It also takes the control of others' lives away from us. It sets us free to develop our own connection to our Source and to ourselves, a connection free of the demands, expectations, and plans of another person. It can even set us free from our own demands, expectations, and plans.
######ROSIE....well i see we have will (making choices etc) but i would like to say "giving up my negative ego/ false pride" and there again "cooperation" with my HP....making choices to take care of me...keeps me from controlling /being controlled by others....yes, focusing on ME, and my alignment with the SOURCE......my own plans right now are working on loving me.....my MAIN focus is , with the help of my higher self, is to repair the relationship i have with me/ universe/ life....thats it...the rest??? what ever will be will be....
When we stop controlling others and allowing them to control us, we become free to take care of ourselves. The First Step is about powerlessness. This step is about owning our power to take care of ourselves.
#####ROSIE...i don't try to control anyone anymore...i am past that pretty much...my committment to my own recovery says that...yes, i slip, but it does NOT last before i get back on track taking care of me.....yes, the first step to me is DETACHMENT....giving UP, the fighting and protecting and manipulation of and accepting that something is over our heads in coping with by ourselves........2nd step is giving IN to the knowledge that we cannot do this alone, but with cooperation with source we CAN...3rd step is the DECISION to take care of us, and to ALIGN with our HP as we understand it....letting go and clearing the energy/karma so the universe can come in.....
This is the freedom Step. In this Step we make a decision to live life differently. We make a concious decision to begin taking care of ourselves with God's help. We start creating a life for ourselves, the life we want to live.
#####ROSIE...i think all three are the freedom steps....you STOP the fight....you REALIZE/ACCEPT that there HAS to be another way of doing this.....you FIND that there is and you do your part/cooperation......yes, "going it" with the help of my inner higher power.....looking WITHIN instead of WITHOUT.......
This process of surrender happens not once, but again and again as we master a succession of lessons--- lessons of healing, liberation and love. Each time we may think: That's it. Now I've learned. the cycle goes around again...
######ROSIE...its a revolving door...surrendering happens over and over and over again...i REvisit the first 3 steps all the time.....
#######ROSIE.....yep, its my "revolving door"....over and over we learn....there is NEVER a point where we say "thats it" we are NEVER done, not until we cross over teh great devide.....its a constant cycle....AS we revisit it becomes more routing, more natural, more serene......thanks DONE