this is my *entry* on this hope for today message

Hope for Today - August 17

     I was excited when I came to Al-Anon and found
the Twelve Steps.  I felt as if I finally had
permission to live life my way, but instead I found
myself using the program to dissect other people's
lives.  I know many people who could benefit from
the wisdom I was receiving in Al-Anon, and I
decided it was my job to enlighten them!
    

#####ROSIE...yeah, no more HAVING to believe  this way or that way, it was  *hp as i understood it*  and  to maybe a degree i got into other peoples *stuff*  like when someone said i *HAD to forgive the perp*   i used to get all triggered about it because the ONLY thing i could do  did do was to take my hands off him and let god  dispose of him as he did....but yeah, i did try to *sell my point of view*   so thats  not  *live and let live*   NOW if i don't agree with a suggestion, i  *take what works...dump the rest*.....i don'l think i tried to *enlighten* anyone, but i did get side tracked from the focus being on ME

 Then I came to a new understanding of Step
Three, in which I turn my will and my life over to the
care of the Higher Power of my understanding.  I
finally realized I don't have to enlighten anyone.

######ROSIE...step 3 was hard for me, i felt like i was giving UP my life/ choices/ freedom et al,  when in reality all step 3 IS, is the willingness to  COOPERATE  with my higher power AS i understand it...also it means  ALIGNMENT with my higher power  aka the *source*  aka the *universe*....so i am NOT losing, but gaining....ALLOWING myself to tap into the benevolent energy of the source/universe to work  THROUGH me  as  better health/ better wealth/ better love/ better self _expression...when i saw it this way, i didn't feel like it was a    surrendering thing that was a trigger...i had to *surrender* to the perp, so surrendering to me meant  giving up me/ my being/ being absorbed  etc.   

Part of turning my life over to my Higher Power now
includes turning over my loved ones and all of their
words, actions, and attitudes as well. 

######ROSIE.....YES....FINALLY  i have come to be able to do it naturally now.....give them OVER ...DETACH  from their issues/ lives/ problems...give them OVER to  THEIR source.....AND yes, their words/ actions/ attitudes/  their life paths  it is NOT my business how they choose to live their lives/ walk their journey.....each spirit on earth has the unassailable right to   WALK THEIR OWN PATH.....i know this ...i accept this....i do everything in my power to DO this

 Allowing my
loved ones to make their own decisions and learn
from their mistakes gives them the gift of dignity
and gives me the gift of serenity.  When I'm not
spending my energy trying to figure out other
people's lives, I have the insight to make the
everyday decisions that bring me peace.

#####ROSIE...yes, allowing them to make their own choices/ reap their own consequences frees me from the  anxiety of trying to live their lives when i have my own to live and my hands are FULL just taking care of me....tending my OWN garden....they gotta do what they gotta do...i'll share my ESH  with them....help them help themselves...through loving detachment i can listen to them and  help them come up with their own decisions/ solutions. and whether i agree or not....i AINT my business.....all that extra energy i have now,  goes to ME/ MY recovery....keeping the focus on ME

Thought for the Day
     Today I'll stop minding other people's business
and create some business of my own to mind.

     

#####ROSIE...AMEN...i got my OWN crap to deal with...i have my OWN journey...my hands are full takin care of ME...and you know,  doing this makes me MORE loveable to my loved ones...they know they can come to me with their  triumphs and trials and their victories and failures and i am not gonna judge them....NOT gonna tell them what to do....NOT gonna *rub their noses in anything*   so i am more close to my loved ones....cause they KNOW....rosie is not going to judge them/ criticize them/  shes gonna love them anyway...good/bad/indiferent...i'll give support/ esh/ loyalty...thats all i can do...

  "Al-Anon helped me to . . . see that many of my
       problems stemmed from minding everyone's
       business but my own."
             *Courage to Change*, p. 234

#######ROSIE....yep,   i looked so much outside of me, i didn't even KNOW there was an inside to me.....in the beginning i was so sick/ so living in the external,  i did not live AT ALL in the internal where my  body is/ my emotions are/ my intuitions are/ where my BEING is...my BEING is in the internal  NOT the external where i once lived..when i was shutting down to survive,  i totally abandoned my OWN internal..where the  I of me  is......NEVER AGAIN!!! i will fight to my last breath to not EVER let that happen to me , where the evil in my life is so bad, i have to literally have to shut DOWN  my own being in order to survive....THOSE days are GONE!!!!!  i am discerning now and i can SMELL unsafe people!!! and i  stay AWAY from them......oops kinda got of track here,  but you know what i mean..............DONE/  rosie