The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
First thank you Louise for the wonderful except. I put in on my desk at work and will place it in my daily meditation book!!!!!
I feel that I am living with Sybil....My A called me on his way home to tell me was going to stop and play 9 holes of golf. We have pizza on Thursdays, so I asked if I should go ahead and order the pizza, he said yes, said he would talk to me later and that he loved me. Pretty decent conversation I thought.
Around 11 as I was laying in bed, I called his cell phone and of course it was turned off. I left only ONE message!!! (big accomplishment for me) Just said, "When you get this message please let me know that you are okay." I finally fell asleep around midnight and awoke at 6 for work. No messages on my phone, I called his cell and it is back on but now he's not answering it. I didn't leave a message. (Patting myself on the back)
My day will be spent talking nicely to myself, reassuring myself, I will be okay. I can make it on my own. I will not react to his behavior. Let go and Let God! I have a feeling the HP is going to take him for a very hard ride.
I thought a DUI would be the best way, but I know my husband and I know he get very lonely, his friends will get tired of his insane behavior and go home to their families and he will be left alone. God will provide for me and my kids, I know I can do anything I set my mind to. Today I will sit down with the bills and see what corners to cut. I know there are a lot I can do without.
Say a little prayer, I asked my HP for strength and grace to handle what is coming my way.
I went to the library and got some books called "The Tightwad Gazette", they are GREAT books, full of information on how to have a great life on VERY little $.
Friends of mine can hardly believe that I make things work on the little $ that I have, but I think I do pretty good.
Rather than have feelings of deprivation, it has made me feel good about myself. I know how to tighten my belt along with the most hardened depression survivor. My Mom was born at the time of the depression and had it pretty rough and even she sometimes laughs at my frugalness, LOL.
I know that no matter what happens with our economy, I have learned how to live with less and be HAPPY with that. It is a great feeling.
Here are some tips:
I wait until goodwill has a sale on clothes, like all clothes that will fit in a bag for $5.00. I carefully fold and ROLL up clothes until there is not a single ounce of air left in them. I then stuff them down into bag and actually STEP on them to make them as flat as possible. I once got enough clothes for my daughter's entire school wardrobe. Learn to like the smell of bleach, LOL, since I bleach EVERYTHING to smitherenes that I get from goodwill. It comes out 99.9% germ free, MUCH cleaner than what you buy at store. Most kids clothes that end up at goodwill are pretty good quality, they have stood up to years of kids and washing. Since I buy clothes so economically, I can afford to "wash dangerously" and try the bleach thing. I put STRAIGHT BLEACH on many stains with a Q-tip and have not ruined anything yet. Straight bleach gets out most stains, but make sure as soon as the stain disappears you rinse out the bleach with water, or it will weaken the fibers.
I buy my daughter nice looking but naked dolls at goodwill and sew pretty clothes for them.
I drive around ritzy neighborhoods in yard sale season and have gotten a LOT of really really nice children's clothes this way. These people are usually not trying to make money, they just want to feel good about getting rid of what they don't need this way.
Learn to like tuna, it is a cheap and healthy form of protein.
Most of all...make friends with your crockpot! It will turn the cheapest and toughest cuts of meat into the most tender, flavroful meat you could imagine! Buy some meat on sale and put it in there with salt, pepper, herbs, cheap veggies like potatoes and carrots and you have dinner DONE and it is delicious.
Check out those books, they will really help you. The author has a wonderful sense of humor and these books are really enjoyable.
When I left last, it was my attitude that I could earn enough to eat, and by the grace of my HP, keep a roof over my head. I would rather live in poverty than with an active A. Poor is just a state of mind. I'm broke and in debt, working and with my A. I would be better off financially by myself, as, like Isabela, I am frugal.
I wear Gap, Tommy, Liz, Bass and all the designer clothing. All, from Goodwill. They vary from town to town, and when I vacation in Fla, I buy the castoffs from West Palm Beach. Pretty ritzy!!!! I've done this for years, even when I made excellent income. I paint (for a living) and like, yesterday, I ruined a really good blouse. I didn't cry too hard, as it cost $3.29.
Think about your serenity...that is what is priceless. Good luck...g
My day will be spent talking nicely to myself, reassuring myself, I will be okay. I can make it on my own. I will not react to his behavior. Let go and Let God! I have a feeling the HP is going to take him for a very hard ride.
I thank you for your inspirational words as I am relearning how to control my own life again.
God Bless.
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Light, Love, Peace, Blessings & Healing to Us All. God's Will Be Done. Amen.
