Al-Anon Family Group

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Post Info TOPIC: Keeping the Focus on Me


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 305
Date:
Keeping the Focus on Me


Hiya eveyone,


I am not sure what has been going on with me of late.  However, in the last couple of weeks I have been on my husband about the possibility of him drinking again.  For whatever reason the fear is kicking up big time.  I know he has dropped off his meeting schedule and isnt reaching out.  But I also know that it is not my business.  I know there isnt a darn thing I can do if he decides to pick up again.


I am trying to figure out what is going on inside "me" that is stirring up all of this.  Needless to say it isnt making for a happy household.  I guess my question is - is this a normal thing in new sobriety.  My husband has 9 mons.  It seems that my anxiety should be lessened. 


Karen


 



__________________
Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care. Love you all! Karen


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 144
Date:

Hi...yes, there is something you can do if he drinks again!!!!  You can consider your boundaries violated, and not tolerate living in a home with alcohol present.


However, you cannot control his decision whether or not to drink.


My A has been sober for over a year now, and yes, I still think it's just a matter of time til the alcohol once again "wins".  It's happened before, even after 10 years of sobriety.  My A doesn't believe in a program


I do spend this time trying to focus on me...and think about the choices I have, should he again choose the booze over me.  I do yoga, I meditate,  work my 12 step program, read much literature, and I have opened my own business, separate from one we own together.  Should he drink, and should I decide to leave, I have a life separate from his.


When we're together, I never mention his drinking.  He has chosen not  to seek help, tho' I've told him that might be helpful to him.  That was his choice, and it is his choice to make.


My choice is to FOCUS ON ME, and my recovery...I'm as sick as him, from the insanity of living with an alcoholic.


Best of luck to you...take what you like and leave the rest, G



__________________
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.