STEP ONE: We admitted we were powerless over alcohol----that our lives had become unmanageable.

Each of our lives has been devasted by someone else's drinking. We cannot change that fact. We have been profoundly affected by the disease of alcoholism, Its effects continue to mermeate our lives. Nor can we change the behaviour or the attitudes  of those around us. We cant even put a stop to the drinking. We are powerless over alcohol. As long as we persist in the delusion that we can control or cure alcoholism, its symptoms, or its effects, we continue to fight a battle that we cannot win. Our self esteem suffers, our relationships suffer, and our ability to enjoy life suffers. All of our energy is wasted on a hopless endevour until there is nothing left to attending our own needs. Our lives have become unmanageable!

Whether or not we live with active drinking, life is unmanageable whenever we lose perspective about what is and is not our responsibility. We take offense at the actions that have nothing to do with us. Or we intervene where it is inappropriate and neglect our legitimate obligations to ourselves and others. Our misplaced concerns for another becomes intrusive, meddling, resented and doomed to failure. Instead of helping those we care about, we demonstrate a lack of respect for them and create discord in our relationships.

We can certainly see what this disease is doing to others,,,but can we see what it is doing to us? Keeping the focus on ourselves, and learning that we cannot help those who do not want help,,,we can only help ourselves, and alanon teaches us that we have choices, we are not alone anymore, one day at a time,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,gardengal