The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Ever since way back when he was still in recovery he used to say... "For an addict, thinking is doing. If the addict thinks about taking a hit, it's already done. It might be later that day, or years away" I used to think this was some sort of recovery philosophy. But I wonder now if there is any sense to this. I want to tell him that I don't think that's really true. Just because he thinks about getting drink doesn't mean that he has to.
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I'm like a pinch of tea...put me in hot water and see how strong I can be.
My ex aboyf told me that alcoholism is an obsession of the mind but by practising AA this can aid and help recovery, allowing him to make choices and put things into place when the obbessional thinking takes over, such as attending a meeting calling his sponsor etc. I suppose what strikes me thought that whatever the answer is to your question is as long as you are keeping the focus on yourself and your own recovery perhaps the answer will not be as important to you anymore. In my experience my ex has said some very annoying irrating expressions that really wind me up, I then try but it is often hard to take a step back, look at myself and ask why has that certain expression got to me so much. Take care Lisa
RainyJamie - I've heard that too. It is an annoying thing to hear, because it makes me think he's releasing any responsibility for his actions. Like chick29, though, I think its best not to focus on these words. Or really ANY words coming out of an A's mouth. Pay attention to their actions.
funny how you find it annoying and i would be relieved if i heard ah utter those words. he has determined that the obsessive thinking is adhd convincing himself and his psych that he needs to be on amphetamines. talk about not taking responsibility! plus a new drug to boot.
Yeah, how very deep. So, then if he THINKS about staying clean, then he WILL stay clean. How marvolous!!! Addicts are so very special, with their "magical" thinking and all. I wonder if "regular" plain ole non-alcoholics have thoughts that actually lead to actions.......If I HAVE A THOUGHT (who knows WHERE these "thoughts" come from....) about painting the bathroom, then is the bathroom already painted? Maybe later when I look it will be painted as I already had the thought......maybe it will be tomarrow....hhhmmmm....this isn't working for me.....maybe I'll ask the A to THINK about painting the bathroom....after all, if they think a thought it is so! Sorry, just remembering how I hated the A's philosphies about his special disease....
That is program talk about non-recovering addicts; those in the throes of the addiction. It speaks about the very thin wall between the thinking and the doing for those who do not have a solid recovery program to rely on.
It will work for an overeater, gambler, sex-aholic, nicotine addicted or even to an enabler or codependent. Too bad it raised all those hidden resentments. Ooooh well thats what meetings, literature and good sponsors are all about in these program of recovery.
Permit me to lend you one of my most bestest slogans...."Don't React".
