Al-anon is a program which is supposed to be spread through attraction rather than promotion.  How do we do this?  We live our lives in a manner that might cause another person to look at us and wonder how do they live their life with so much peace, serenity, joy, happiness, kindness, tolerance, consideration, etc. etc. etc.  This wonder might even lead to longing-and so the attraction!

"So David, how come you are so positive all the time?"  (and by the way I am not positive all the time, but enought of the time so that you might notice it! ) I was asked that very question the other day by a  co-worker.   Without getting too preachy I told the person because of a way of life that I am learning to live in a group of people I meet with every week.  Then I let it go.  If they want to know more, they will be back to ask again I am certain.

I know when I first came around the program it was just that way for me.  The people there had something special in their lives.  The more I was around them, the more I learned of their lives and how they had been through things similiar and sometimes far worse than I had I knew they understood me.  And yet somehow their lives now were so full of living.  Not perfect.  Far from it, life happens without fail.  Relationships end.  People get sick.  People die.  The world is not always kind or fair.  However in spite of it, these "program people" were able to live and to do so with a calmness and a level of acceptance that I could not comprehend fully.

So I wanted what they had.

Al-anon, as with all 12 step programs are (self-professed) spiritually based.  What does spiritual mean?  My dictionary says, "of, relating to, or concerned with the soul or spirit"..hmmm...okay what does that mean?  Again my dictionary says spirit is "the intelligent or immaterial part of man as distinguished from the body".  the soul, it says is "the immortal part of man...the moral and emotional nature of man, distinguished from his mind".

What all that says to me is that 12 step programs are about getting away from myself.  To live beyond the belief that this one small shell of flesh is all that there is, that my body and my mind are small in the larger scheme of things.

If I look at the steps of this program, I find that the pay off if I do them is that, as it says in step 12, I am going to have a "spiritual awakening" as THE result.

It goes on to say that after this happens I/we try to carry this message to others and to practice these principals in all our affairs.

So much of our world is being diluted.  So many of the traditions, values, morals, ideals that served to get this humanity to the place it is today are diluted in the name of "political correctness".  Somehow we as a society turn our backs on the very things that have given us the very opportunity to stand up today and shun that which has gotten us here.

Al-Anon teaches through example.  We have our guidelines, for example, only conference approved literature should be discussed in meetings.  This and the other guidelines is to preserve the integrity of something that has proven effective, something that works for any and all that wish to apply it to their lives. 

Al-Anon is governed from the bottom up instead of from the top down.  I decide what is best for me.   As a  member of an Al-Anon group, I have a voice and a vote to decide how my group will operate.  I get to state my opinion to my family group, as does everyone.  We can vote on something like whether we want to use the Lord's Prayer or the Alanon Declaration in the closing.  Doesnt really matter what side I am on once the vote is taken.  I accept the group's choice and move on with working my program.  If it comes out the way I voted, that's easy.   If it goes the other way, while I might be initially disappointed, Iwill certainly not take it personal and I will certainly not let it stop me from coming back to the place that is my source of life.

As a Group representative, I have a voice and a vote at the District and Area level of Al-Anon.  I present my groups ideas to a higher level, and the process is repeated here, and on up to the world wide level.

I am not sure why I am being guided to write all this, quite honestly. 

Religion is a topic that can sure keep me from recovery if I let it. 

I do not.  I don't let someone coming into a meeting preaching about Jesus Christ, Allah, Buddha or The Great and All Powerful Doorknob of Destiny take my focus off the prize of recovery.

Early in my recovery, I heard a woman sharing in a meeting.  The week before I had listened to her and been so filled with the beauty of what she said.  This particular day she introduced herself as "X, grateful member of Al-Anon and Recovering Catholic".  I didn't hear another word she said.  What she said  didn't bother me  because she said  "catholic"  because it would not have, anymore that it would have if she said she was atheistic.   What bothered me was that she was putting Catholicism down, and that a few other people in the room laughed when she said it.  I took that personal at that time.  Not that I was a rabid catholic, but I was raised in that faith and I therefore felt as if she was putting me down.

Today, I still hear that on occasion.  It no longer bothers me.  It is irrelevant.  I have learned to take what I like and leave the rest.   I stopped looking at the differences and started looking at the similiarities.  That works so very much better for me.

I have grown through williness. Through perseverance.  I will not be diverted from my primary objective.  Recovery from the effects of the family disease of alcoholism.  That and living each day for what it is, a precious gift to me from my Higher Power. 

Yours Still in Recovery
and with much love for you all,

David