The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
He came over and was severly manic. Same as he has been. He bounced around and tried to make convo but he was like a 12 year old boy in front of me, the parent. Anyway, he asked how I was doing with all the "stuff" and I told him and I think his reply was "yeah, that really sucks." Sucks? When I spent 40 dollars on a manicure and then chipped my nail on the door lock that sucked. This is a bit worse than that. But that is the mentality I am dealing with. He bounced around and couldn't look me in the eye very much. He asked what the mediator said and I told him he said there is no mediating our case. He said "wow, that really bums me out. I guess I'll go." Ok, whatever. I get up to walk him to the door and he grabs me, kissing me and the next thing I know he is done and throwing on his clothes and running down the stairs saying he has issues and he's a bad person......I was again just lying there like I just was hit by a truck. And we all know that is not at all in the least fun. That's what I am saying. So, I'm slightly pissed. I put on my clothes and get the kids and talked to an alanon friend and had a few laughs at the whole situation. At least I know now that he is not the end of my world. And as much as I like to think it's me, all me, today showed me, yet again (I hope I get it now) that he is crazy. Sick. Untreated Bipolar 1 is serious and gets worse when left untreated. Plus his sex addiction and his narcissic complex and the ADD and the OCD and the PTSD and God knows what all else he has developed in the course of his life. I'm nuts y'all but in an alanon kinda way. So, not the best way to have handled the situation but I am ok. I really am. I might not be later but for right now I know I am still here and still moving forward one step at a time. And I even know that I loved the man he was and he is not that man anymore and probably never will be again. HP gives me what I need. Thanks for your love and support...
You slept with him???????? I can not tell you who is the crazy one. Al-anon will not allow me. Just from my experience, none of it's worth it. Now he is probably thinking he can come over and actually have you tell him it's over and then you still go to bed with him........boy...he's good! Take care of yourself..........a bit better okay? You have to remember you are worth being loved for who you are not what you can give out. ((((HUGS))))
I don't think I'd call that "sleeping" :D :D More like a hit and run!
I'm so glad you are "OK" right now . . . laughing at the situation, perhaps a bit more clear. I know why I have a year long R.O. with my A. He's too darn hot and too darn dangerous. Take care Serenditipity, "unpack" this little interlude and learn what you need from it :) Kim
