The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I would like to share an analogy that I thought of the other day. I got the idea when I read an email from a friend of mine, her hubby is a drinking buddy with my hubby. It all started out when one man in their group got into a very serious motorcycle accident Sunday night after a weekend of drinking & riding. The only good thing was that he was alone on his bike at the time & no other vehicles were involved. In the email she told me that this man had an idea to start a "motorcycle club" and that her hubby was going to be the president. That is a scary thought. At the time she had sold her motorcyle, so she bought a brand new one so she wouldnt have to sit home while they went riding. Now she has ridden for 25 years or so. The statement that got me thinking was that she bought the bike so she could go because she knows how her hubby is & that he needs a "keeper". I immediatley thought classic enabler attitude! I thought wow, I used to feel that way, like it was my "job" to be hubby's "keeper." Then I had an idea I could relate this to something real, like jobs!!!
My old job: Husbands' keeper (enabler) Boss: alcohol Co-workers: his A friends & others who werent in recovery Hours: 24/7 Pay: trying to control others, giving up "me." Benefits: insanity, worry, anxiety, misery, pain & suffering, irritability, to name a few!
New job: Recovery Boss: HP (God) Co-workers: friends in recovery! Hours: still 24/7 Pay: is the ability to live life to the fullest!!!! Benefits: sanity, peace, serenity, happiness, contentment, joy, sometimes trials, but knowing I have my program tools!!!
I LOVED this anaology! It was helpful to see a couple of things what the "price" of my behavior is and what the "rewards" of my behavior are--this analogy makes it simple and clear and also helps me understand detachment & boundaries better. I would never work for a crazy, addicted boss, so why would I do work for Alcoholism? Seems pretty simple when you put it this way.
I could relate this to something real, like jobs!!!
