... That I may leave nothing undone... - Al-Anon Family Group

rtexas · ~*Service Worker*~

... That I may leave nothing undone...

maresie2 · ~*Service Worker*~

I think I go through times when I find the A totally exhausting and the physical and emotional toll takes a long time to percolate down. I know personally I had the flu recently and felt totally wiped out by it.

I also know for me personally there are issues separate from the A that are difficult for me to deal with. When I met the A he could not do enough for me, he was supportive,kind, understanding, helpful. That man has gone awol. He's gone. He can be like that for others sometimes. He was like that for his mother for a while last fall. He surfaces very rarely. I have not seen him for years. Nevertheless the A can be cooperative at times especially when I am not in over react mode. Needless to say I don't feel that I have a partner at all. I don't feel he steps in and helps out at all. He may co operate better but it is hardly a partnership and there are days when I just want that. I don't want to have to gird myself all the time to deal with him and that's the reality. I do better when he is totally impossible but nevertheless he is still impossible and detachment or no detachment that takes a toll on me.

There are times for me when I am still before moving through lots of stuff. For me personally that's when my unconscious is shifting up a lot of stuff. I find that there are often hiccoughs when nothing much seems to be happening. For me it is a reminder that I have to keep at it.

Maresie.

CJ · ~*Service Worker*~

rTX

i have also found myself "stalling" at times. i still have to deal with life. ie - job, home, chores, and feelings. in my program, i've tried not to put excuses on why delaying (program) work, but, rather, have taken to the understanding that i can't do it all and have it "out of the way". it never gets "out of the way".

my responsibilities are mine. i prioritize them - and more often than not, i do put my responsibilities to my program (to myself, really) on the back burner. it is not the best thing for me, but it is how i manage, one day at a time, to live true to my values and goals for the future.

thanks for your share
cj

twinmom2 · ~*Service Worker*~

(((RT)))

Glad to see your post. I can appreciate your position in stalling out on the steps right now. I'm really in the same boat. I was just discussing that with my sponser the other day. I realized that I didn't want to work on the questions because I was personally having a hard time with the concept of the step. Step 3, I'm still working on it, and I feel confident that when I'm ready to pick it up again I will. Thank you for sharing its nice to know that other people are going through it too. Your doing great, keep moving and doing what you need to do for you. It will all fall into place.

Peace,
Twinmom~

irish54 · Senior Member

((((rtexas))))

I can totally relate to you situation. I too found myself "stalled" on step 4. Everyone tells me that it's very tough working this step , and I agree. However, they also tell me once I get through it and on to 5 and 6, 7 & 9 I will feel so much weight off my shoulders. It's been tough for me, because going through step 4 so many memories and past stuff is "recycled" through our feelings. I too had put it off .... daughter leavinghome, grandaughter moving in ...so much other stuff going on. But now I realize the real reason I'm having a difficult time with my sleep patterns and accomplishing my normal work is because each day my inventory gets added to, lol, and so now that I am back working on it I feel I'm making progress and not just building up more inventory to work through. It all gets pretty overwhelming!! I don't regret taking a break .... I needed that; but now it's time to start again.
Much love to you!

Irish

abbyal · ~*Service Worker*~

Hello Rt , I suspect u may be grieving what appears to be the loss of your relationship , we grieve what could have been should have been , but isn't . I often hear people say I just want things back the way they used to be. makes me shudder I didn't want things the way they used to be ,it had to be diff or I din't want it back at all .
When we set boundaries there are concequences some not so pleasant , but trust me you never know what is gonna happen tomorrow . Just keep on doin what your doin The God of my understanding has some of the most unique ways of solving problems tht I never would have thought of . and trust me I thought alot hehe . and it ain't over til the fat lady sings . good luck Louise

Karilynn · ~*Service Worker*~

((((((((((Rtexas)))))))))),

Easy does it there my friend. The steps aren't always easy, and step 4 is a doosy. I too am dealing with some issues/baggage that have nothing to do with the A. Like you, it's causing me to sleep wierdly. (Or is that because I work retail? ) Answers come when we are truly ready to receive them. It may not be your time yet. Hang in there, the always comes out.

Love and blessings to you and your family.

Live strong,
Karilynn & Pipers Kitty

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.