The material presented
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I think it happened. I truly can't tell you if this was it or not. It seemed like it. I almost left him on Sunday after a war of the worlds (or words!) again. I was completely done with the emotional abuse. Then came the drink after being sober for a couple of weeks. It was his first hard try, I almost knew it wouldn't last long. Of course, I probably caused him to drink (sarcasm, people!).
Anyway - Monday - missed work, says he was having a nervous breakdown, hated what they were doing to him at his job, terrified that his wife was leaving him. I came home that night with the kids to him passed out. He said he went to have a couple of drinks at "his" restaurant and couldn't remember where he parked the car. (It was in front of the restaurant) Had to have a friend come pick him up and take him home (didn't call me at all while this was going on). He apparently blacked out. And basically hit his bottom.
My husband is pretty functional most of the time and I've only truly seen him sloppy drunk one time in the last two years. He doesn't go out with the guys. I've never seen him pass out. Usually, he just gets tired and goes to sleep. He does get a little off balance, but nothing major. So, for us, for him - this was a huge scare.
I guess for him this was his bottom. He's been sober for four days now. I'm proud of him, I somehow believe that he had his "come to Jesus" meeting on Monday.
I'm just scared to get that false sense of security and let my guard down, kwim?
And I'm trying really hard to not think of what else happened on Monday to make him wake up so fast. Guilt? He says he remembers nothing and that scares me more than anything.
Well I hope your right , but don't be dissapointed if it isn't his last . Get to meetings for yorself , there is nothing u can do about him . but alot u can do for yourself . Only he knows when he has hit his bottom and his actions will speak alot louder than his words . good luck keep the focus on you . Louise
4 days. usually, that was the time span it took my wife to reallllly start itching again. expectation leads to disappointment leads to anger leads to sadness leads to resentment. be careful of YOUR thoughts and take try the 'one day at a time' principle. (((hugs))) i'm sorry you have a tough situation, many prayers to you cj
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time to stop going to the hardware store to buy bread.
Wow what a roller coaster for you. I know for me living in the roller coaster I never thought to do things to recover for me. My focus was always on "him".
i have to say i agree with cj, expectations are premeditated resentments. i've done it many times myself. when my AH would come home from a "binge", he'd tell me all kinds of crazy, scary situations that he was in and i thought for sure that was enough for him to ask his HP for help to quit. i thought for sure all the mess and pain his addiction was causing in our family would wake him up. ha ha ha. i've been fortunate enough that he recently checked himself into treatment. his HP is really working hard with him right now. but guess what? i NEVER would have guessed that this time would be it. that he's been in worse situations. that he would've had to be arrested or injured or kicked out of here before he would reach for help. all i heard was excuses and i knew he wasn't done. now, he did it on his own...without my interference. i'm just so grateful that my HP and al-anon is here for me. checking himself in was MY wake-up call. i need to help myself and i pray that you can do the same. i've realized you really have to "Let go and Let God" i hope that your HP can help you to not worry about what he's doing and when he's going to ask his HP for help. i agonized for a long time because i wouldn't allow my HP to help me do that. i also hope, as for any addict, that he can allow his HP to help him become sober. i pray for both of your recoveries! "Keep it Simple"
