The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hello Family, I have been greiving....... and in doing so I find the good , the bad and the ugly. I do not often post, I guess it is because I can at any time go to a meeting attend an onlie meeting or just chose to sit quietly and maintain a little space for my HP to chat .
The weather here had been very unseasonalby warm and that alotted time for various things to do . I had not noticed so much how dark it was or how the days were dreay.
I had a bout with anger that felt most uncomfortable until a few members here helped me sort out where the anger was coming from and that it was good to feel it . It also served to remind me that I can very easily bottle up my emotions and chose to not experience them and they will manifest in some other way like confusion.
I have not really considered if I was feeling a little depressed or sad or lonely or anything ... I was just feeling numb from august until I felt the anger. It seems that life goes on after death in some manner. It is something we have to do when someone we care about leaves this world we have to continue to live. I can honestly say I take each day one day at a time.
But I can not always be cheery as there are times the tears will just happen and that for me is a private thing. I certainly have not isolated, but I also have not started to feel like I am living either. At times it feels like my mind and heart are on different pages of this book .
I am grateful for the time I had with this person and certainly have wonderful memories. I also have an empty place that seems will always remain.
I have completed 2 paintings that were connected to thsi person and for me that is moving forward. Like processing a great deal of data. I will say it has also made me conscious of what it means to live life and survive life and the difference between the 2.
I do want to thank everyone that has listen to me and offered loving words and have tolerated my moods thru this. I am a very grateful member of this place and am honored to give service. Just for today I am taking care of me
It has been such a blessing, just to be able to write my feelings down. I figure, how can I unscramble my thinking if I don't start putting pieces of thought together. Thanks for your great share.
with love cj
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time to stop going to the hardware store to buy bread.
How lovely to see your name on this board today. You are struggling with things and I wish there was more we could do to help you. As you said It's NOT easy to stay cheery all the time... I am learning that myself right now.
You are a very strong person, and you have your faith. It takes time, but I feel you have things in your life, that will lessen the load for you.
You have given me words of encouragement on more than one occasion...lol
Please know their is always someone here for you.
(P.S. My sponsor tells me posting and sharing It's a sign I'm growing.)...lol good for you maggi.
